


Growing Pains

by ShipersAnonymous



Category: Grown-ish (TV)
Genre: Anaaron - Freeform, College, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-01-05 05:56:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 40,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18359987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShipersAnonymous/pseuds/ShipersAnonymous
Summary: One day of fun results in an unplanned pregnancy and leave Ana and Aaron to deal with all kinds of growing pains.





	1. 1st Month

**Author's Note:**

> This was a suggestion from two dear friends of mine and I'm very excited to start my very first full Grown-ish fic. Hope you all enjoy 😍♥️ Forgive my Spanish, I'm far from fluent 🤭🤭🤭
> 
> XOXO  
> 😍😍

* * *

 

1st Month 

 

[Ana]

 

I'm lying in bed, sweating under a mountain of blankets and feeling completely and utterly sick. I can't keep anything down, my body feels drained of all energy, I can barely stand without the room spinning and my stomach occasionally hurts. Mom and dad have been insisting that I go see a doctor but I think that it's probably just a bug and that with lots of water and rest I'll probably be alright. I got sick 3 days after I arrived for the Christmas holidays and was lucky enough to not be sharing a room with anyone considering the fact that half my family is here. Gracia, my older cousin, waltzes into my room and says,

"Ana, necesito un tampón,"(I need a tampon)

"Mira en la primera gaveta," (look in the first drawer) I answer 

 

She comes in and makes her way to my chest of drawers where she finds the tiny box right where I said it would be. 

"Wow, it's brand new, that's strange," she remarks. 

"What do you mean?" I ask, half asleep.

"Well, you normally get your period before me," she notes.

"It's probably late because of the bug," I mumble turning my back on her to get a little more comfortable and she chuckles.

"Yeah probably. You know if you weren't so single I'd say you're pregnant," she says and my eyes shoot open.

"Why would you even think that," I chuckle out nervously, praying that she doesn't notice.

"Dios mío (my goodness) Analisa, come on. Nausea, dizzy spells, tummy aches, exhaustion? Those are classic pregnancy symptoms. Your period being late would be my confirmation though, you're menstrual cycle is as OCD as you," she explains and leaves the room abandoning me to my thoughts. I'm struggling to swallow as a lump forms in my throat.

 

"If you weren't so single" 

 

Her words echo in my mind and suddenly I find myself racing through memory after memory of my most recent encounters with Aaron. A particularly steamy meeting comes into focus and I feel my face flush as I remember each and every detail, specifically the fact that we didn't use protection. A wave of dread washes over me and I clap my hand over my mouth as the possibility makes me sick. I rush to the bathroom, making it just in time to hurl out what little I had for lunch. I brush my teeth after and my reflection is a painting of surpressed hysteria with eyes open wide in an attempt to dry out the tears. I lean over the counter when I'm done and stare at myself in the mirror.

"You are not pregnant," I whisper the mantra to myself over and over again in my head; trying, in vain, to make it stick but a voice deep in the dephts of my consciousness is screaming otherwise.

 

I drag myself back to bed and shut my eyes against a possible reality that I refuse to face. If I don't think about it, it won't be a possibility and my period will show up soon enough. With that thought on replay in my mind I drift off to sleep. Thankfully no giant baby nightmares scare me awake until the next morning. I get up from bed and rummage through my drawer for some underwear as I ready myself for a much needed shower. In my search I uncover an open box of tampons with a single missing tampon. The box that Gracia opened yesterday lies ontop of the chest of drawers where she left it and relief floods over me as I try to make sence of the situation. I bought an extra box with me on the trip because my period surprised me by being uncharacteristically early and I didn't want to get caught unprepared during the holiday season. I let out the easiest breath ever breathed as my body completely relaxes. Phew, that was a close one.

 

[One Week Later] 

 

I'm feeling a bit better and just in time too, because I have a gynaecologist appointment set for today and I'd hate to have to miss it. I only trust our family gynaecologist. She saw my cousins and I through puberty and I've grown accustomed to her. That's one of the many reasons why I refused to get a new one when I moved for college. I'd rather wait and see her over the holidays. 

 

Samantha Hanigan is a warm woman. Blonde with green eyes and a wise motherly smile. Her face lights up when she sees me coming through the door and she gives me a welcoming hug. 

 

"Ana, always a pleasure to see you," she greets excitedly. 

 

"Nice to see you too Dr. Hanigan. How have you been?" I ask as we each take a seat on either side of her consulting table. 

 

"Now, now that's my question but if you must know I've been very well thank you," she jokes. 

 

"And how are you sweetheart? Your mother told me that you haven't been feeling well lately," 

I nod my head dismissively and answer 

"It's just a bug. I haven't quite recovered yet but I'm feeling a bit better," 

"What are you feeling?" she asks and I chuckle nervously. 

"Um nausea, can't really keep much down. Uh, I was very dizzy but I guess that's just cause I wasn't eating anything and...fatigue. Yeah I'm really tired," I list out the symptoms. 

 

She takes of her spectacles and looks at me worried. 

"When was the last time you had sex?" she asks unmoved by the word and my cheeks heat up. 

"Uhh last month some time," I answer, averting my gaze from hers. 

"I see, and when was the last time you had your period?" she asks and I confidently respond, 

 

"A little over two weeks ago," 

 

"Was there anything different about it? In terms of the heaviness of your discharge and the period of time it lasted for?" 

 

I feel myself grow alert at her questions. Could there still be a possibility that I'm not exactly clear of the danger zone? 

"Um, yes actually. It only lasted a day and it was really light but then again I've never been a heavy bleeder," I answer. 

She gives me a concerned look before she asks me to meet her in the ultrasound room. 

"I'm not pregnant," I assure her despite my own uncertainty and she offers me an understanding smile. 

"I'm not saying you are sweetheart, I just want to rule out the possibility. Compulsory medical procedure. I'm sure you understand." I nod my comprehension and leave the room. My heart rate quickens as I wait for her, prepped and ready for ultrasound. I press my hands to my exposed abdomin, trying to feel if anything is different, if anything was growing inside it but I shake it off and scold myself for entertaining such an idea. 

 

Doctor Hanigan finally walks in and I smile at her ready to be proved right. 

"OK little missy let's see what you've got cooking in there." 

She squeezes the cold gel on my abdomin and a shiver a little. She spreads it around with the ultrasound wand and presses a few buttons on the machine. The image is transmitted and everything looks practically normal to me. My smile fades when I turn my attention on to the doctor's face and see the grim expression that resides on it. 

"What...what's wrong?" I ask alarmed. She sighs, removing the wand from my belly and takes off her glasses before looking at me and saying, 

"Well, congratulations Ana, you're gonna be a mom." 

 

An annoying ringing sound floods my ears and I feel my heart stop. My mind goes completely blank and for a blissful moment I forget about my very existance. Then I look at the screen and my world comes crashing down on me. 

 

"I'm, I'm..." I can't bring myslef to string a coherent sentence together and Dr. Hanigan takes my hand in hers sympathetically. 

 

"You're pregnant Ana." 

 

"But I can't be! There has to be some sort of mistake. Please tell me there's some sort of mistake," I plead as tears find their way into my eyes. Her expression tells me that it's highly unlikely and I feel the blood drain from my face. 

 

"I'll give you a minute," she says, taping my hand lovingly and leaving me to my thoughts. The tears begin their journey down my face and I close my eyes unsure how to describe what I'm feeling. An overwhelming panic begins to set in and I find myself longing for my happy place. I clean myself up and without another word I leave. I walk with a purpose letting the cold December air numb me from the outside in and soon I find myself in front of my childhood church. I walk in and make my way to a pew where I kneel and pray. I pray for forgiveness for having sinned, I pray in gratitude that my life is not in danger, I pray for protection for me and for the life I am carrying but most of all I pray for strength to be able to see this through. 

 

I don't doubt the good Lord's plan for me. If he brought this child into my life there must be some reason for it, I simply need to discover what that reason is. Having the child isn't a question for me. I made myself a promise a few years ago that unless my life were in danger I'd never resort to abortion. I don't judge those who do cause at the end of the day the only skin I can feel is my own, but my heart could never live with such a burden. This child's life is the only thing I'm certain of right now. The rest of my life has been turned completely upside down. I won't lie, I'm scared. Scared of what my parents will say, scared of what the gang will think, scared of what this means for my future but most of all, scared of how Aaron is going to react to the news that he is going to be a father. 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took a while, I wrote this chapter in third person narrative, so I hope you guys enjoy this one ❤️ 
> 
> XOXO   
> 😘😘

2nd Month

 

For Ana, the past week has been an endless stream of conversations with herself. Her mind is a cesspool of questions that need answers and she has no where to get them from but herself (and occasionally Google). For now she knows that her baby was mostly likely conceived on the 22nd of November, just before Thanksgiving, and that what she mistook for her period was actually a process called spotting. It was her body accepting the new life about to grow and she confused it with an all clear. Ana chuckles at the irony of it all as she lays on her bed, in her locked room with her hands caressing her stomach. She's had to resort to locking her bedroom door because people simply barge in there like it's a free for all circus and she can't run the risk of being caught acquainting herself with her future child. Cause that's what she was doing. 

 

She was getting to know the little bean that would be using her body as a home for the next eight months and though it probably hadn't developed a brain nor the ability to feel as yet she wanted it to know that it was loved. Once she'd gotten over the shock and initial fear of finding out she was expecting, her motherly nature took over and she found herself growing attached to the little shred of life inside her. That attachment grew into a shaky kind of love and that love generated a fear inside her that she has no control over. It's different from the insecurities she has regarding what the pregnancy means to her life and to the people around her. This is an anxiety ridden, panic enducing type of fear. The fear of harming her unborn child. She finds her self taking new precautions every day. She reads the labels of everything she eats, re purchased any chemical supply she had (from shampoo to nail polish), replacing them with less harmful alternatives and avoids any type of physical contact or activity that would in anyway put strain on her abdomin. 

It was like suddenly her life revolved around keeping that little baby safe. That life inside her doesn't just own her heart. It is her heart, and she will do anything she can to make sure that it's OK. 

 

She looks down at her tummy and pictures the bundles of cells multiplying to form a little human. Ana closes her eyes, imagining that she can sence as each of those cells separate into different groups then blend back together to form a tiny nose, tiny lips, tiny eyes and tiny ears. She pictures the miniscule fingers wobbling in an unconscious hello, and the little feet kicking as her baby dreams. If she focuses hard enough she can hear its little heartbeat and though scientifically that's impossible, to Ana her baby's heartbeat lies within the echoes of her own pulse. She smiles as she tries to imagine a child that's a perfect blend of her and Aaron. A beautiful light chocolaty skin tone, with the curliest hair and most fascinating smile. Ana wonders whether the baby will have small, relaxed eyes like Aaron's or if it will take after her and have large, expressive ones. The thought of Aaron drags her down a dark path. As much as she wants to stay positive and think that he'll want to be there for the baby she can't help but think about the worst. 

 

She's replayed the reveal over and over in her mind. She's sorted through every possible reaction he could have and allowed herself to feel every emotion she might have to his each response. She's even shed a few tears as she pictured his look of horror, got hurt by his rejection, died a little inside with his suggestion that she terminate the pregnancy... 

The sound of her Skype ringtone drags her out of her spiral and she reaches for her phone to see who's calling. 

Aaron's name bounces on the screen and she jolts up in her bed, blinking fast in order to dispel the tell-tale tears in her eyes.

 

"Hey you," she greets cheerfully when she finally answers. Aaron is laying down with his head against the bed's headboard and from the looks of it he's shirtless. 

 

"Hi there mamacita, how are you?" he answers just as cheerful. He was starting to regret calling her cause seeing her smiling face and not being able to touch her is making him long for her more than ever. 

 

"How are you?" she asks and he grins, 

 

"You know, surviving. I'd be alot better if you were here with me," he flirts and she blushes in a way that's so adorable he's certain she's trying to torture him. 

 

"I miss you babe," he whispers out, his voice taking on a suddenly serious tone. 

Ana felt her heart call out to him. She knows without a doubt that she loves him and that makes the possibility of losing him that much more real. 

 

"I miss you too," she chokes out, trying in vain to keep the sob out of her voice. 

 

"Hey, hey don't cry babe. We'll be together again soon," he tries to comfort her. If only he knew the real reason why those tears are running down her face. 

 

"When did soon become an eternity?" she sniffles out, keeping up her charade. This wasn't a conversation she could have with him over the phone, she'd just have to keep the baby a secret until she saw him. 

 

"When I looked in to your eyes and found my home," he answers taking her by surprise. She offeres him a teary smile and he breathes a sigh of relief. 

 

"There's my sunshine," he remarks as he tries to study her face. A little bell inside his head is ringing, telling him that something isn't right with Ana, but it's hard for him to read her through a blury virtual image. 

 

"You alright babe?" he asks and Ana nods her head, yes, while she wipes away her tears. 

 

"Yeah. I'm fine," she says dismissively and he can tell that she's lying but, before he can ask her about it, his little nephew runs into the room screaming his name.

 

"Uncle Aaron! Uncle Aaron!" he says and jumps on to bed, 

 

"Woah, slow down there little man," he smiles and Ana feels a little tug at her heart strings. 

 

"Can you make me some hot cocoa? Please?" the little boy asks and Aaron chuckles. 

 

"I'm on the phone now Lavon, go on and ask your mama to make it," he answers 

 

"Awww come on Big A, mama can't make cocoa like you," he says with a pout and Aaron turns to mush,

 

"Alright, alright, I'll be there in a second," he gives in. Ana chuckles when he turns to face her, 

 

"What's so funny?" he asks. 

 

"That's the quickest I've ever seen you give in," she answers and he laughs. 

 

"Well I have a soft spot for kids OK? Sue me," he says while pulling a t-shirt on, over his head then his smile falls when he notices the weird look on her face. 

 

"For real Ana, be honest with me, what's wrong?" he asks sternly. She shakes it off and answers, 

 

"Nothing, nothing. I'm just a little tired is all," which wasn't exactly a lie, she just wasn't telling him the whole truth. 

 

"OK so I'll leave you to get some rest then. Let me attend to my little man and his chocolaty needs." He says, trying to hide his concern. That feeling in the pit of his stomach tells him that she's hiding something but he can tell that she doesn't want to talk about it so he let's it go for now. Ana pouts a little, making him wish he was closer to her, and says 

 

"I wish you were here. I'd sleep alot better if you were here with me." 

 

"I wish I were there too. I love you Ana."

 

"I love you too Aaron." 

 

They hang up, the distance hitting them harder now. Ana closes her eyes and tries to sleep it away but Aaron has no such luck. His feelings for her still surprise him. He wonders how he could have fallen this hard, so fast. It's more than just infatuation, it's love. He counts down the seconds till he gets to see her again and his entire body feels her absence. It's insane, he knows, but that's just how emotions work. You don't get a say on who you love nor how deeply and right now he'd go to hell and back to see that sunshine smile permanently on her face.  

 

"Big A!" Lavon calls from the kitchen and Aaron comes back to reality as he's summoned by yet another person he'd kill and die for. He walks into the kitchen and his little nephew smiles at him melting his heart completely. 

*You are going to be the worlds easiest father* he thinks to himself as he gets out the milk and hot cocoa mix. 

 

"Don't forget the marshmallows," Lavon reminds him and he laughs. 

 

"Hey...You wanna come make this yourself?" he jokes and the little boy shakes his head. Lavon reminds him alot of his younger cousin, Lavon's mother. She was a teen mom but even after the father left her she persisted with the pregnancy. 

 

"This is my baby Aaron. I don't need that son of a bitch, I'll give it all the love it needs," she'd told him as he tried to comfort her. He admired her resilience and found her love for her unborn child inspiring. When her parents kicked her out he persoaded his parents to take her in. He even started tutoring on the side to help her pay for her prenatal treatments, it wasn't much but it was what he could do at the time. When Lavon was born Aaron can't describe the nervousness he felt as he waited. His heart was a sledgehammer in his chest that came to a complete halt when he finally held the little guy in his arms. His cousin made him Lavon's Godfather and in his heart he knew that the little guy was his son. 

 

He hands Lavon the warm mug and plants a caring kiss on his forehead. 

 

"Thanks Big A," he says with the cutest and brightest smile, warming Aaron from the inside out.

 

"Any time lil man." 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK so this one is still the second month and it's a little angsty so please read with caution.  
> Minor and very sweet cliffhanger ahead.   
> Hope you like it ❤ 
> 
> XOXO  
> 🤭🤭

[Ana]

I fall into the habit of early morning jogs. Somewhere in the mountains of research I conducted it stated that keeping in shape has many benefits during pregnancy so thats what I've decided to do. Although the weather outside is unforgiving I find the stillness of winter somewhat comforting. The quiet let's me roam through my thoughts as I try to figure my life out. Despite my attempts to stay positive, I can't help but think of unwanted consequences so I've started preparing myself for the worst. I've been searching for jobs in the vacinity of the university and have tried to picture what my room in our apartment would look like with a crib in it. My body hasn't really gone through any changes so maternity clothes aren't a priority right now and I'm still reading up on the pros and cons of breastfeeding.  
* _Ana stop it!_ * a voice inside me yells as i round the corner to our street and slow down as I get close to home. Apart of me is freaking out and wants to get everything done as soon as possible but another part of me is waiting to wake up one day and find out this was all one huge misunderstanding, but until I wake up from this dream I'm going to make the best of it and I vow to myself to be the best mother that I can be.

I smile as I insert the key into the lock and open the door, partly because of the endorphins but partly because I'm confident that everything is going to be OK. I'm a strong independent, woman, the greatest and most positive cliché in existence. I can take care of myself and my baby and no one is going to stop me. I stop dead in my tracks when I walk into my room and find my mother seated on my bed. The laundry basket is on the floor and in her hands are my prenatal vitamins.  
"¿Analissa, qué es esto? (What is this?)" she asks, her eyes meeting mine expectantly. In her face I read a plea, she wants me to tell her that's there's a perfectly good explanation for this. One that doesn't involve her becoming a grandmother.  
"Mama," I tred cautiously but she cuts me off before I can finish.  
"¿Estas embarazada? (Are you pregnant)"

I open my mouth to respond but no words come out and my mother rises to face me.   
"Analissa Patricia Torres answer me. Are you pregnant?" she whispers frustrated and I can tell that she's trying not to make a scene so as not to wake the rest of the house.  
I feel the tears roll into my eyes and cast my gaze onto the ground before I dryly respond,

"Si."

My mother drops the box of pills and backs away from me, her hand over her mouth and her eyes in disbelief. She slumps back onto the bed and I look at her through hooded eyes as tears fall down her face.  
"Mommy, I'm so sorry," I say falling down on my knees in front of her and placing my head on her lap as I, too, begin to cry. She remains motionless and I look up at her, the sight breaking my heart. Her eyes are closed shut, almost as if she's trying to wish it all away and her hand is still holding her mouth closed shut, leaving the only evidence of her sobbs to be the shivers that shake her shoulders.  
"Mommy, I'm sorry. Perdona me.(forgive me)" I beg, my vision blurred by the overflow of emotions spilling through my eyes. My mother shakes her head then mechanically takes me off of her lap, picks up the laundry basket and leaves my room without so much as a second glance at me.  
All the security and confidence I felt a minute ago, vanishes from within me and I find myself feeling completely and utterly alone. The fear I had when I first found out comes crashing back and suddenly I no longer have control over my life. I crawl onto the bed pushing each limb to the limit before I curl myself into a ball and cry myself to sleep. The tears that run down my face taking every shred of control I have over my life with them.

Meanwhile...

* * *

 

[Aaron]

Beep....

"Hey Babe, I uh, I was just thinking about you. Ha, what else is new. Um I'm just... checking up on you, call me when you get this. I love you," 

I leave the message and end the call just as my mother calls me down for breakfast. I had the weirdest dream that Ana and I argued and it left me with an unsettling feeling. As I enter the kitchen I notice a familiar silhouette helping my mother on the stove. The blood in my veins freezes when she turns around and I recognize the face of my ex girlfriend Lila.

"There he is," she says, scooping some scrambled eggs onto a plate.  
"Lila... What, are you doing here?" I ask.   
"Aaron! Is that anyway to welcome an old friend! Lila doesn't need an excuse to drop by she's family," my mother says smiling her brightest smile. She never got over my break up with Lila, which is insane cause we dated for a year when we were like sixteen. I remember my mother talking to Aunt Susanne about the two of us getting married...needless to say that dream hasn't died as yet.

"Well, I'm off to brunch with some of the ladies from the office. You two behave while I'm away," she says, grabbing her bag from the counter and planting a kiss on my cheek before she leaves. Oh she's good. I know for a fact that my mom doesn't have any "lady" friends at the office. She's the advertising agencies version of the Queen of hearts, all the women hate her and all the men want to be her. There's no way this isn't just a ploy for Lila and I to be left alone.

"Well I see your mom hasn't changed a bit," Lila chuckles awkwardly, trying to fill the silence.

"Nope. Same old Mrs. Jackson," I respond. Bobbing my head for emphasis.

"You on the other hand. Wow, you been hitting the gym?" she asks, pouring some orange juice into a glass.

"Yeah, gotta keep in shape," I answer trying my best not to fidget.

"It suits you," she compliments and I thank her before we slump back into an uncomfortable silence.

She hands me a plate with some eggs and toast before taking a seat next to me with a similar plate of her own. It was never this awkward between us. We stayed friends post break up and conversation was easy going. But Lila left high school a year early for some sort of training course abroad and we lost touch. This is the first time I've seen her in almost three years and I feel like I somehow don't know her.

"Who is she?" she asks suddenly taking me by surprise and making me choke on my juice.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Please Aaron. We've known eachother since... Forever. That distant look in your eyes, the 'looking after yourself' glow, your extreme shock at seeing me. Who is she?" she smiles, her eyes glistening with what years of experience help me recognise as a hint of sadness.

"Her name is Ana, Ana Torres. She's sweet and determined. A little crazy but it's part of the reason why I love her," I say then bite back my tongue as I relaize that I'm rambling.

"Wow. You really do like her," she says and I nod sheepishly.

"She's a lucky girl," she adds while pushing her eggs around on her plate. I turn my attention back to my own plate and once again the silence invades...

* * *

 

[Ana]

I don't dare leave my room. I'm too afraid to move. My limbs stiffen from staying in the same position for too long and my head hurts from all the crying. I drift in and out of sleep. Each time I resurface my mother's look of dispare hits me like a harpoon to the chest and I begin to cry starting the cycle all over again. It's late in the afternoon when a wake to a kiss on my cheek. I open my eyes and feel enveloped by a warmth that's tainted with my mother's perfume. Her hand comes over mine and she spoons me like she did when I was a little girl afraid of the dark.   
"Mommy, ma...ma..." I sob, my body to weak and exhausted to speak.

"Shhh. It's alright muñeca(doll). Estoy aquí. Estoy aquí. (I'm here)" she says.   
  
  
  
  



	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The conversations occurring in this chapter happened in Spanish but for length and ease of read, I've decided to write them down in English.
> 
> Chapter may include instances of strong language. 
> 
> Enjoy❤️😊  
> XOXO

[Ana] 

My mother holds me till I fall asleep and for the first time today I do so without any nightmares. I'm awoken by a gentle nudge in the middle of the evening. 

 

"Wake up, my love. You haven't eaten all day so I brought you something," my mother says as she gives my shoulder a gentle squeeze.

 

"I, I can't move mama," I confess languidly. I'm too stiff and too weak to move a single muscle. Understanding my dilemma my mother starts with my legs, gently picking the top one off and stretching it. I feel a rush of pins and needles as the blood begins to circulate again and my mother exercises my leg (making me bend at the knee then stretch again) before she let's go and moves on to the next one. She does the same thing to my arms and then turns my body so that I'm lying on my back. Lovingly, she helps me sit up and props me up against some pillows. 

 

"Better?" she asks softly and I nod with a shaky smile. 

"Much, thank you."

Mother smiles back and places the tray over her lap. On it is a bowl of soup, half an apple and two glasses - one with juice and one with water. I watch her carefully as she procedes to feed me, the process is slow and gruelling at first but soon I regain my energy and reach for the bowl.

"Ah ah ah, let me do it," she says and continues till the bowl is scooped clean.

 

"Thank you mama, I really needed that," I say and she places her hand on my cheek, stroking it gingerly with her thumb. She looks at me with a smile that slips away into a pained expression and I feel my self growing teary again. 

 

"I'm really sorry mama," I say as I hold her hand and plant a kiss on the inside of her wrist. At first the words just spilled out of my mouth, it seemed like the right thing to say but I wasn't sure what I was aologizing for, but now, after thinking about it for almost a whole day, I know. I was apologising for breaking the oldest rule in the book, no sex before marriage. I was apologising because of what this meant to my name, to my family's name and to our entire reputation. I was apologising because I was raised better than this, because I knew better and still didn't take the necessary precautions. I was apologising for not being the daughter she thought I was. 

 

"No doll, I'm sorry," she says taking me by surprise. 

"I reacted the way I did because I was shocked and embarrassed, not that you were pregnant but that I hadn't noticed sooner. I didn't even know you had a boyfriend. What kind of a mother does that make me?" she asks, her eyes shimmering. 

 

"A human one." I answer. "There was no way you could have known. Being my mother doesn't make you a magical being that simply knows everything that's going on in my life. I should have told you, I just didn't know how to," I say, my last few phrases drowned away by my sobs. 

 

"No baby, no. You're young and I don't expect you to be perfect. I'm not upset with you. I'm just worried,"

 

"You don't have to lie to me mama. I saw the hurt on your face, I put it there," I cry, without the courage to look her in the eye as I remember her expression. 

 

"Aninha, my little doll. You didn't put that hurt there. I did. Me and my fear and my old ways. I let my rigid upbringing get the best of me and didn't allow myself to be your mother. But I'm here now little girl, I'm going to be with you every step of the way. That baby won't grow up without a family," she says as she places a hand on my stomach. The action warms me completely and it's almost like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. 

 

"Baby?" comes my father's voice from the door and thats all it take for my relief to vanish completely. My mother and I both turn to face him and the furrow of his brow reveals a reaction completely different from my mother's. He isn't hurt, he's angry. For the longest minute of my life he simply stares at me. His gaze burns my skin with the flames of anger that blaze behind his eyes and some where in the sparkle of that fire I recognise a hint of disgust. That hits me like a punch to the gut and I rap my arms around my mid section as if that alone can protect my baby from his threatening stare. Impulsively, my father opens my wardrobe, takes out my travel bag and begins to stuff it with all my clothes. 

 

"Leo, what are you doing?" my mother asks tentatively, as she rises from the bed. I feel a shift in her mood and sence that the soft spoken question is just preparation for the storm she's about to unleash. What better way to kill a fire than with rain? 

 

"I didn't raise a hoe, and that's exactly what she is. I will not have her under my roof!" he screams, the sting of his words making me flinch. 

 

"Alejandro, you can't throw her out, she's our daughter," my mother says, her voice rising an octave but still soft enough to sound like a mere warning. 

 

"Your daughter maybe! My Analissa died the minute the spread her legs for a man she wasn't bound to by Holly matrimony! She's a sinner, a concubine of the devil! A..." 

 

Mother snaps and let's out a blood curdling scream that brings the entire family to my room. 

 

"Alejandro Martin de la Viega Torres! You will not, kick our daughter out into the streets in the state she is currently in! Our grandchild will not be raised without a family, not as long as I live! Do you understand me?" she yells and my father stops packing my bag. He looks at her with that anger brimming just beneath the surface before he turns his heated gaze onto me. 

 

"It will have a family. Just not my family. You're confined to this house until that thing is born and then you're giving it up," he says with a tone of finality. The thought of losing my baby takes me out of my scared stupor and flings me into a panicked despair. 

 

"Papa please!" 

"Andre!" my mother and I both scream as we start to protest but he cuts us of with a stern, 

 

"Enough! She's giving it up for adoption and that's final!" he screams before he storms out of the room and slams the door behind him. My arms go back onto my abdomin and I pray that my baby stops growing. Maybe if he or she stays within me I won't lose my baby. I'll get to keep them forever. Reality kicks back in when my mother raps her hands around me and says, 

"He won't take your baby away from you. I won't let him," 

I cry into my mother's shoulder as she kisses my forehead and holds me close. I feel defeated, I feel violated, I feel angered but most of all I feel determined. Determined to keep my child no matter the costs. I won't lose my baby, and no one, not even my father, will stop me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

[Ana]

My mother gives me a light sedative and I sleep through the night. Morning roles around and as the first rays of sunlight make their way into my room my mother shakes me awake with a frightening urgency.  
"Mi hija, wake up. Come on," she whispers and I mumble something in my grogy state of sleep.  
"We have to go, get up." she says, pulling the blanket off of me. The morning chill creeps over my warm skin leaving behind a trail of goosebumps and kick starting my body. Before I have the chance to properly open my eyes a shower of warm water graces my skin and my mother’s tender fingers work the shampoo in my hair into a mild lather. That’s how I know she’s worried. Since I can remember whenever my mother was upset with something, her maternal instincts came through and she became the very definition of the word caring. It was her way of reassuring herself that she still had control because when things got bad her only thought was my well-being and that was the only way she found to reassure me and herself that she could still keep me safe.

“What’s wrong ma’?” I ask and in response her hands grow more aggressive. I reach my soaked hands up to her arms and hold them still as I turn around to face her.  Her eyes are tear filled but she’s trying hard to hold back. My worry level completes my transition from sleep into wakefulness and I ask again,

“Ma’ que passa?”

“Nothing, nada. Just turn around and let me finish or we’ll be late,” she responds brushing her weariness off. Although I see through her act I chose not to pry…just yet.

“Late for what?” I ask instead and she turns the shower back on to rinse the shampoo out.

“I made a doctor’s appointment for you for this morning,” she answers.

“Mom,” I whine. “It’s six in the morning, Dr Hanigan’s office doesn’t open till ten,”

“I called in a favour with her and she agreed to open up early,” she counters raising my suspicions.

“Why would you do that? I’m not in a hurry mom, especially not after what dad told me yesterday. I swear with the way he talked he’d be happier if I…” I say and suddenly a realisation hits me that makes me sick.

“Wait. Are you making me end it? Please tell me you, of all people are not going to make me abort my baby.” I plead, feeling then now familiar sting of tears in my eyes.

“Cállate (be quiet), stop asking me so many questions,” she hisses. My heart drops to the pit of my stomach and a poisonous resentment towards my mother begins to rise. My mind struggles to comprehend how she, a devout Christian woman and over protective mother could want me to commit such a heinous act against human life. Inside me an battle is being fought between the side of me that believes that struggles to connect my loving mothers image to a person who would propagate such violence and the part of me that sees the evidence all too clearly. A gynaecologist visit under such rushed and secret circumstances? She’s ashamed of me and wants to ensure that the outside world remains oblivious to existence of my “mistake”. The ‘ah-ha’ moment brings me a painful clarity that makes me feel dirty despite the bath I’m currently taking. I feel unloved, unwanted, monstrous, corrupted, vile and every other derogatory term you can think of. I find myself right back where I started, completely alone.

The thought weakens my will. It’s barely been two full months and I already feel defeated, I’m too tired to fight. Last night everything seemed salvageable because although my father shunned me and basically pronounced me dead, my mother was still by my side. Her valour when she stood up for me, the apology she gave me, the way she held me as I cried and reassured me that everything was going to be ok…it comforted me. It made me feel like I had a safe place to fall back on. And now here I am. The pillows have been pulled from underneath me and I’m free falling into a sea of jagged rocks with no helping hand to pull me up. No hero to save me. Completely and utterly alone. A less than human misfit, a pariah that everyone is trying to get rid of. These thoughts cloud my head, forming a dangerous storm inside me that stirs me closer and closer to depression. I allow my mother to dress me, feed me and drive me to the clinic, all the while I’m running on auto pilot. I’m saving my strength so that I can fight, saving my strength for that moment when the poisonous needle is brought into the room where I am currently laying with my mother nervously at my side, waiting for the doctor to come in and take my precious gift away from me.

I’m stirred out of my vengeful spiral by the feeling of a cool liquid on my stomach. The room grows uncomfortably quiet as all the attention is drawn to the screen. Dr Hanigan moves the wand this way, then that, clicks a few buttons on the machine and suddenly….

Do-doom

Do-doom

Do-doom

The miraculous sound rings through me as I hold my breath and fully take it in. That’s my baby. That’s the sound of a life growing inside me. That’s the heartbeat of a future president or director or teacher. That’s the sound of Aaron and I bound forever. I don’t hold my tears back as a smile crosses my face and when I look back at my mother her expression mirrors mine. She reaches her hand out to me and I take it, gratefully accepting the light squeeze. The doctor smiles at us both before leaving us alone so that we can soak in the beauty of the moment. As soon as the door closes my mother rushes to my side and hugs me, planting a kiss on my head. We cry in each other’s arms and I pull her closer to me as I beg,

“Mama please. Don’t make me do it. Don’t make me kill my baby.”

She plants another kiss on my forehead and places her hands on either side of my face as she lowers her gaze on to mine.

“Never mi hija. I’ll never make you do that. I just wanted to see my grandchild at least once before he or she is born,” she says, her eyes red from crying.

“What do you mean?” I sob out confused.

“You remember Uncle Ernesto? The pilot?” she asks and I nod.

“Well I called him last night and asked him to get you a ticket back to California. Your flight leaves in two hours.” She explains,

“Ma!” I exclaim shocked. “I haven’t even packed my bags and what about Papa?”

“Your bags are in the car, I packed them last night and don’t worry about your father, I’ll deal with him,” she reassures me. I look at her determined expression and smile gratefully, her features soften and she pulls me in for another hug.

“Gracias mommy.” I say into her hair and she rubs my back.

“You don’t have to thank me. You’re my baby…I won’t let anyone hurt you. Never ever.” She sobs out. We take a few more minutes to recollect ourselves before we wipe away the tears (and ultrasound gel) and make our way to the airport. With my luggage waiting on the pavement I turn to my mother with a knotted heart. She places her hand on my cheek and I lean into her loving gesture.

“I don’t want to say goodbye,” I breathe out, my voice shaky from the exertion of trying to keep my tears at bay.

“I don’t want to either mi hija. But it’s the only way for you to keep your baby. If anything happens I’m a phone call and a short flight away. You’re never alone baby. From now on it’s the three of us. You, me and el niño. You have to be strong Analissa. You’re not just fighting for yourself now, you’re fighting for your child as well. Don’t be afraid, just be the confident, warrior woman I raised you to be,” she says and in her glimmering eyes I spot something I never thought I’d see again. That very look is what puts my heart at ease as I longingly hug her goodbye and make my way inside the airport. That look is the reason why I am no longer afraid when I buckle us into the seat and watch my little town grew smaller (along with the life I once had), as the plane takes off. That look gives me strength as I open the door to our shared apartment and walk in feeling like nothing in this world could bring me down. All because of that one look that communicated one message, one emotion, the right emotion. Pride.          

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning : Cliffhanger a head ☺️
> 
> Please don't hate me 🙏🏾
> 
> XOXO 😘

3rd Month 

"Surprise!" I yell as both Zoe and Nomi enter the apartment. I welcome them with a full banquet and a spring clean house. I didn't think my nesting phase would start until atleast the sixth month but I guess my obsessive compulsive tendencies combined with the amount of stress I've been under has made me a one woman cleaning machine.

 

"Wow, Ana...this is...amazing," Zoe says as she makes her way towards me for a hug.

 

"Thank God, I'm starving," Nomi confesses as she dips a corn chip into some of the sour cream dip I made.

 

"What are you doing back so early?" Zoe asks, taking off her candyfloss pink jacket and getting herself something to drink.

 

"I uh, I," the words stammer out of my mouth as a rack my brain for a reasonable lie.

 

"I wanted to get settled in before classes started again. Yeah, that's what I wanted to do," I answer finally and she throws me a suspicious look but I guess she decides to drop it because she doesn't push any forward.

 

"So how were your holidays? Any news?" she asks instead.

 

*I'm pregnant and Aaron's the father, did I mention we were dating? No? My bad, well now you know and just in time too cause I'm lost and scared and don't know what I'm going to do. HUG ME!* I think to myself and when I look back at the ladies they're both staring at me like I've lost my mind.

"What?" I ask, hoping that I didn't just blurt that out, out loud.

 

"Did you get a boob job?" Nomi asks and I follow her gaze to my overly stuffed tank top that is now on full display since my robe fell off.

 

"Oh my goodness, no!" I say picking it back up and hiding behind it.

 

"Then you must have been doing something! I mean your boobs were not that big last year...and I would know, I've watched you shower a couple times," Nomi explains turning my discomfort level all the way up.

 

"Come on, what's you're secret?" Zoe asks buying into the fiasco.

 

"Pilates!" comes out of me and I turn on my heel to leave but Zoe stops me.

 

"Wait, before I forget. The mail man dropped this off for you," she says and hands me an A4 orange envelope. I take it and thank her, curious about its contents and as I'm walking away I turn it over and see that it's from my father. My stomach turns and a chill runs through me. I wonder when my father's name began to generate a reaction with in me akin to that of a villain in a horror story. I quietly make my way back to my bedroom and stare at the envelope, too afraid to open it incase there's a nest of poisonous snakes inside.

 

"Woman up Ana!" I tell myself, taking a deep breath as I settle down on the bed and open it. Inside I find a clear folder filled with papers and pamphlets about adoption. Stuck to the folder is a yellow note that's says:

*Do the right thing*

My hands begin to tremble and I drop the folder on the floor like I would a snake that's bit me. I crawl into my bed and hold myself tight in an attempt to stop the trembling. It's a sign of my inner struggle not to give in to the panic that threatens to take over. I close my eyes and repeat the words "No one will take your baby. You are not alone. You're stronger than this."

 

The mantra becomes a lullaby as exhaustion takes over and I drift off into a dreamless sleep.

 

[Aaron]

 

I look at my phone hesitantly before I put it down and focus on the view outside my window. The plane is about to land and I thought of sending Ana a text but if recent weeks have been any indication she probably won't respond. She's been ignoring me for almost a month and not knowing why, has kept me up at night. I'm convinced that I've gone insane, racking my brain over and over for a reason why but nothing stands out. Nothing I've said, done, not said or forgot to do could have resulted in her pretending like I don't exist. I'm confused and bordering on hurt but not quite there. The fact that this is unlike her is making me worry more than anything. What if somethings happened to her? Could she be missing? Is she lost somewhere, afraid? Did someone posion her mind against me and now she won't give me a chance to explain so now I'm destined to forever wonder what could have been?

*Get a grip man* I snap at myself followed by a mental note to watch less crime/mystery movies.

I arrive and meet up with Vivek who's come to pick me up.

 

"What up man?" he greets as he high fives me than brings me in for a hug.

 

"Hey Vivek. How you been?" I greet back as we make our way to his car. Leaning against it looking cas' as usual was Luca.

 

"What are you doing here?" I ask surprised and he shrugs in the cool way he's mastered with years of training then answers,

 

"Was on my way to Zoe's when Vivek offered me a ride. Stopping here was the condition. By the way he has terrible taste in music."

 

With that he slips back into the car and Vivek and I exchange a look then laugh. We never understand this guy. He offers to drop me off at home but I decide to join him in his self invitation to the girls house. Haven't seen them in a while and belive it or not (cause I personally don't) I actually miss Zoe's self centered self and Nomis crazy aura. That and I secretly want to snoop around in Ana's bedroom. At this point her perfume will be enough to calm me down...atleast for a while.

 

"OMG, hey!" Zoe says as she opens the door. She gives us all a friendly smile then makes things awkward by pulling Luca forward and engaging in just enough PDA to make me wish Ana and I were public. Thankfully they move aside so Vivek and I are able to squeeze through.

 

"When did those two become so affectionate?" he asks Nomi, who is in the process of stuffing her face with dip coated corn chips.

 

"Guess distance really does make the heart grow fonder," she says dismissively.

 

"So what's all this? " I ask, changing the subject and helping myself to a chip.

 

"Ana. This is all Ana. Apparently our coming home is enough of a cause for celebration," Zoe says as she and Luca join us. The conversation drowns out around me as the closeness of her presence sinks in. 

 

"Where...where is Ana?" I ask interrupting the chatter. 

 

"Oh she's in her room, actually she's been there for a while now. I'll go check on her," Zoe says but I cut in finding my chance. 

 

"No, no, no, it's OK. You catch up, cause clearly you've been on salt for a while. I...as the gentleman I am will go check on her." I say then leave without waiting for an answer. My knock on Ana's door is met with no answer so I slowly open it and make my way in. It's late afternoon and the sun is setting, bathing the room in a warm orange light. She's curled up on her bed, fast asleep, but she occasionally shivers which leads me to belive that she's probably cold. A grin crosses my face as I think about how cute it would be to watch her face as she wakes up next to me, but the others laugh from outside brings me back to the here and now and me laying down with her would probably seem strange. So I opt to cover her instead. It's the next best thing. I tiptoe to her and on my way there I kick something on the floor. It's a folder with lots of papers and pamphlets and I bend down to pick it up. Curious, I read the documents, adoption papers, and my blood begins to freeze as an idea forms in my head. Her not feeling well, me feeling like she's hiding something, her sudden distance. Could it be? 

 

She begins to stir and I watch her still shocked by the question that's hammering a hole in my mind. She realises that I'm there and a sleepy smile begins to form on her lips but it soon vanishes when she sees the folder in my hands. A look of shock crosses her face and in her eyes I notice a flash of regret which hits me in the gutt, making me fall to my knees. A single question escapes my lips. 

 

"Are you pregnant?" 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about that cliffhanger everyone🤭  
> Hope this can make up for it ❤️❤️
> 
> XOXO 😘

This is it. This is the moment of truth. Aaron is on his knees and has just asked Ana the one question she's been trying to avoid. She wants to say yes. She wants to smile and tell him that he's going to be a father. Then she looks at his face, his lips set in a semi-frown, his brows partially furrowed and his eyes...his eyes take her back to the moment her mother found out.

He's pleading.

To her, he's begging her to save him from the misory that he's pictured himself in if she opens her mouth and says yes. Pleading with her not to ruin his future by admitting the existence of their forbidden fruit. Imploring that she say it isn't true so that his tense muscles can relax and he can finally take her in his arms like he has been wanting to do for the past two months that they've been apart and everything goes back to normal.

To him, however, he's pleading for her not to lie. He's been through this before and he knows that it would be easy for her to tell him no, then carry their child like a burden somewhere far away from him. If the adoption papers are anything to go by she's planning on giving the baby up...he'd never know. Then somewhere, ten years from now, she'd come clean and they'd have a * _Gossip Girl_ * situation on their hands but he's not sure if he could ever forgive her for that. He'd never be able to live with himself knowing that he has a child somewhere out in this world that thinks their father, that ** **he** ** didn't want them.

* _He's better off not knowing._ * she thinks

* _I'm here for her no matter what._ * he tells himself.

* _I'll lose him if he finds out._ * a voice inside her screams.

* _I'll always love her._ * his heart beats out.

The silence is crippling and both are being driven insane by their thoughts.

* _Maybe she's scared to tell me...maybe I should tell her that I'm here no matter what._ *

* _My father was right. He can't know._ *

"Ana, I..." he ventures

"No." she answers finally.  
"I'm not pregnant,"

A wave of relief washes over his features and that's all she sees before she turns her eyes away from him, missing the moment when his heart tightens with dissapointment.

* _Relief. He's relieved._ * she thinks, her chest burning with the false notion that she made the right choice. Still on the floor, Aaron is over his brief moment of relief and now has to deal with the crushing dissapointment. In that minute when he waited for her to answer he'd already pictured what his life would be if the word out of her mouth had been "yes". He'd hold her and kiss her and tell her how happy she'd just made him before he booked the next flight out of here to her parents to ask for her hand in marriage. He'd get a temp job, ask his parents for a loan to get an apartment, be with her every step of the way until he finally held his baby in his arms. He had a feeling it would be a girl and she'd be the most beautiful little lady he'd ever laid eyes on (after her mother ofcourse).

But now, with a single word, his baby girl glimmers out of existence before his very eyes. She doesn't exist. Just a figment of his imagination. He feels his heart beat slow...how could the loss of someone so unreal still hurt this much?

"What are these for then?" he asks, still holding on to a shred of hope and she gives him a weak smile, trying her best to make it as convincing as .

"It's for an assignment. I had some time on my hands so I decided to do some early research." she answers.

"Oh." he says, as he gets up and puts the papers on the side table.

"Why do you sound dissapointed?" she asks as he joins her on the bed. Her pulse picks up speed as she waits for his response. Although, no matter what he says she's either going to feel regret for having lied to him or heart ache for his overwhelming relief.

"What? Um... No I'm not dissapointed...to be honest, I don't know how I feel," he says, looking up at her with a sincere expression.

"What do you mean?" she asks, unsure what to do with his mixed response.

"I'm conflicted. I mean don't get me wrong it's good that you're not...a baby, its alot of responsibility, but it got me thinking...you know what never mind," he says, dismissing it. He just got her back and the last thing he wants to do is scare her away with talk of a commitment more serious than date night. She, on the other hand, wants to press on but from the look on his face she thinks it best to let whatever it is go. They'll have plenty of time to uncover talks of a possible child in future, she thinks.

"How are you feeling?" Aaron asks, changing the subject.

"I'm fine, why, why would you ask that?" she answers, once again on high alert. He strokes her cheek and smiles.

"You were sick remember, and I haven't heard from you in almost three weeks."

"Oh, right. I'm, I'm fine. It was just a really bad bug but it's gone now," she chuckles out shyly.

"Good, so they'll be no harm in me doing this..." he says then reaches up to plant a soft kiss on her lips. A fire ignites deep in her belly and she doesn't know if it's the time they spent apart or her hormones acting up but she's just about ready to rip off his clothes and have her way with him. A collective laugh eminates from the other side of the door and she breaks away.

"Stop. We'll get caught," she says and gets off the bed with a goofy smile on her face. She doesn't get very far because Aaron has her hand in his and pulls her back towards him.  
She screams playfully as he brings her back onto the bed and lays on top of her trapping her in place. He drowns her yelp with yet another kiss, just as slow but deeper and more passionate.  
"You're the one who's gonna get us caught with all this screaming," he says between kisses and she chuckles on his lips in response.

"What the hell!" comes a surprised cry from the door and the two turn towards the sound to find an OMG faced Zoe standing at the door.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy. Sorry for the wait but here's another slightly angsty chapter 😍.
> 
> I'll try to keep my updated frequent but I can't make any promises so for now... Enjoy ❤️
> 
> XOXO   
> 💜💜

[Ana]

 

"Zoe wait let me explain!" I say, as I push Aaron off of me and make my way towards her. Completely ignoring my plea, she walks out of the room slamming the door behind her. I go after her, hair a mess, robe forgotten and barefoot. The boisterous chit-chat dies down as we enter the living room, all eyes are on us. 

 

"Zoe, please, let's talk about this."

 

"I don't want to talk about it Ana, sorry I interrupted your little 'moment'," she says with her back to me. 

 

"Whoa, what's all this?" Nomi asks, stepping towards us from behind the counter. 

"Moment? What are you talking about Zoe?" 

 

"Would you care to explain?" Zoe asks, whipping around to face me, 

"Or should I?" She crosses her arms and stares me down. 

 

"No, that's alright, I'll do it." I answer as Aaron, who's been quietly standing behind me, steps forward and takes my hand in his. He gives my hand a slight squeeze of reassurance and I look up at him, grateful for the support. His hidden caring nature is definetly something I'm going to miss when he... I shake the thought from my mind and focus on the task at hand. I'm not ready to picture my life without him, it hurts too much. Hits too deep. 

 

"Aaron and I are dating," I finally blurt out and just admitting the words out loud makes me feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. The room is silent and the expressions all around form a varying spectrum of astonishment. 

 

"How, how, long has this been going on for?" Nomi asks her face stating that she's still trying to process that information. 

 

"We'll be a year in two weeks," Aaron says, surprising me with his accuracy, and making my chest tingle with warmth, though underneath that fuzzy feeling a dark shadow lingers. I haven't even lost him yet but each day he finds a new way to make me fall in love with him and each time I can't fight it. I end up digging my own grave deeper and deeper until I find myself questioning what will happen to my sanity once I have to let go. Will I ever be able to love again? 

 

Zoe scoffs, breaking me out of my momentary pity party, and walks out of the apartment. 

"Zoe wait!" I scream after her yet again, this time following her to the door. Aaron prepares himself to follow us both but Nomi holds him back. 

 

"Oh no mister. You're gonna stay right here and tell us everything. Vivek, get the twins on the phone we're having an intervention." she says, directing him towards a seat. I give him a reassuring look from the doorway and he understands my message loud and clear. He knows that I have to be the one to talk to Zoe and so with a trusting nod of his head he let's me go. 

 

I charge down the hall way after her storming figure, screaming her name. 

"Zoe! Wait up!"

 

"Leave me alone Ana!" 

 

"Come on, let's talk about this!" 

 

"There's nothing to talk about, just go back and enjoy your coming out party!" she screams as she reaches the lifts. To my bad luck it opens upon her first push of the button and she steps in. The doors close just as I reach her and it's too late for me to stop her. I run for the stairs taking them two at a time. I won't let her go out like this, she's not thinking straight, Lord knows what could happen to her in this state! I make it to the last flight, my body is trembling from the sudden exertion and I'm completely out of breath. I see her run for the doors and yell with what air I still have left in my lungs. 

 

"Zoe stop!" my voice echos through the quiet entryway, and she pauses in her step and turns around. 

 

"What is it Ana? I've already told you there's nothing to talk about!" She yells back, her arms gesturing wildly through the air. In my minds eye I see her walk away from me and the thought petrifies me. Yet another person in my life I might lose. My baby and my true love aren't enough, now I need to lose my sister too? No. Enough is enough. I won't take another loss without a fight. 

 

"If there's nothing to talk about then why are you angry at me? Huh? Why are you running away from a situation that shouldn't affect you?" I ask, poking the bear. I want her to explode. I want her to come at me. If that's what it takes to make her feel better than I'll take each word, blow for blow. 

 

"Angry? I'm not angry Ana. I'm hurt, and the fact that you think this doesn't affect me leaves me that much more dissapointed," she says, the look in her eyes hitting me like a slap in the face. She shakes her head in pained disbelief and walks out. I recover from the blow and run out after her. 

"Zoe wait, please!" I scream, exhausted and bending over in the middle of the road trying to hold my breath. She stops and turns around to face me. Her eyes are teary, a sign of the hurt she's battling not to show.

"Let's talk about this please. Get it all out in the open." I say, standing up straight to look at her. She looks at me, the conflict inside her clearly visible in her face and then she opens her mouth to say something but stops as a blinding light floods the street.

"Ana look out!" she screams, and I turn in the direction she's looking to see a pair of headlights coming at me. In just a second my mind set switches and my baby's safety becomes a priority. Without thinking I walk backwards towards the pavement but I miss a step and before I can process what's happening my boody is hurling back towards the concrete. I hit the pavement with a crash and its light's out. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay but here we have everyone 🤭😍
> 
> June is honestly taking so long 😣 idk how long I can last with this drought 😪😭. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy the chapter 💜😍and stay strong were almost there 😭❤️
> 
> XOXO   
> 🖤💜

[Aaron]

 

I watch her walk out the door with my heart in my hand, but I trust her so I turn back around and do my part with the gang.

"Vivek you better have a really good reason to be interrupting our Netflix binge," Jazz answers the phone, her oh-so-familiar sass audible in her voice.

"Oh trust me, this is worth it," Nomi says with entusiam.

"Wait Nomi? Are we on speaker? What the heck is going on?" Sky questions.

"Hope you're both seated for this..." Vivek dramatizes and I breathe out a sigh and shake my head, planting my forehead into my hand.

"Well spit it out!" the twins demand and I, over of the whole scene, answer

"Ana and I are dating alright? We have been for a year and now we're coming clean. There. Happy now?"

 

There's silence on the other end and for the first time since I've known them I believe the twins are speechless.

"I think you shocked them to death," Nomi says while looking at the phone with wide eyes.

"We're not shocked," Jazz says finally

"We're annoyed that you thought we were stupid enough not to notice,"

"Woah, hold on...You knew?" Vivek squeals looking somewhere between shocked and offended. 

"Duh!" they snap. 

"How?" Nomi asked looking as dumbfounded as Vivek. 

"Well, Sky had a suspicion and she told me and from then on we both started monitoring you and then the two of you basically handed the news to us on a silver platter. I mean, the unintentional stares, the trying too hard to act like you hated eachother, how you'd both dissappear at the same time then reappear within minutes of eachother. The fact that you were both glowing at the same time and yet remained mysteriously single was the sell out though." Jazz explains and in the background I can hear the soft click of a keyboard, she's clearly not impressed. 

"And you two didn't think to share this discovery?" Nomi demands, clearly feeling betrayed. 

"Wasn't our secret to tell." Star states in a straight forward tone. 

"True dat. They have a point." Vivek backs her up before turning to me with a hurt expression. 

"A year bro? Come on. I thought we were homies. All these secrets...this ain't apart of the culture man. Not cool."

"Ok I don't understand what he just said," Nomi points out then adds:

"But if it was something along the lines of we're a family and families don't keep things from eachother then I agree. Come on Luca back us up here."

 

Luca blows out a cloud of smoke before turning to us with his usual Idgaf zen look and answers,

"I can't really back you up cause it wasn't a secret to me." 

Vivek throws his hands up in defeat and Nomi let's out a shrill, 

"What?! Oh come on! How did you find out?" 

I snap around to look at Luca and pray that he doesn't reveal my walk of shame and my prayer is answered in the from of a help seeking scream coming from down stairs. 

"That sounds like Zoe." Nomi says, all thoughts of mine and Ana's betrayal instantly forgotten. 

We rush to the balcony and peer over it, the site makes my heart stop. 

 

A shrunken Zoe seems to be kneeling over an unconscious Ana with a worried crowd growing around them. Zoe screams for help and before my ears register the rest of her sentence my feet sprint towards the door, propelling me towards Ana as fast as I can go. With no time to wait for the elevator I take to the stairs, speeding down with no regard for the possibility of tripping or injury. When I reach the ground floor the entire view is obscured by the still growing crowd and I have to push my way through to get to her. 

Zoe is cradling her head in her lap and whispering that it's all going to be OK with tears streaming down her face. 

"What happened?" I ask as I kneel down opposite her and stare down at Anna's face. 

A stray strand of hair rests on her forehead but I'm too afraid to brush it away in case I accidentally hurt her. She looks so fragile right now. 

"She was...and then the car...and she fell," Zoe recollects, her story interrupted by her heavy sobs. 

"Hey, hey Zoe. Calm down. Its gonna be OK, I'm gonna call an ambulance," I reassure her, trying to keep my breath steady and calm so as not to enduce further panic. On the inside though, a symphony of alarms are going off in my mind. Is she injured? Is it serious? Is she in pain? Can she hear me? Will she ever wake up? 

 

The sound of approaching sirens drowns out my thoughts, thankfully someone else had already called for help cause I was currently in a state of shock. My mind is waging a war with itself deciding whether it should panic and protect my heart from the truth or calm down and allow the possibility that she might be seriously hurt sink in and cripple me. I swallow back tears, this is not the time to lose my cool. Ana needs a hero right now and I'll be damned if that's not me. The paramedics take over, strapping her to a stretcher and carrying her into the ambulance. 

"You should go with her. I'll get the gang and we'll meet you there." Zoe suggests, her voice shaky with emotion but her eyes are sensire, she knows how much I need to be near Ana right now. I shake my head, unsure how to thank her and take my place in the ambulance, beside my love. 

 

The ride to the hospital seems to take hours and all the while I hold on to her hand and try my best not to squeeze. I plant a kiss on it and hope she can feel it. I hope she knows that I'm here, that I'll always be here, that I love her. I bow my head and say a silent prayer that it was just a little fall, that she's not seriously hurt and is gonna be OK. We finally arrive and she's rushed out of my grasp. I follow them in up to where I can then sit down and wait. Waiting is the worst. It's a moment of silence that gives you time to think of all the possible worst case scenarios. Why are they taking so long? Is it a bad thing? Did they find an internal fracture? Is she on the operating table right now? Is... 

 

The gang rushes in (the twins included) cutting through my thoughts and each of them with a different inquiry. They stop dead in their tracks when they notice the look of sheer helplessness on my face. The silence is heavy and they huddle around me, embracing me with their love and support. Finally the doctor makes her way to us and smiles sympathetically as she witnesses the heartwarming scene. 

"Are you the family of Analise Torres?" she asks in a kind but professional tone. We stand and I nod my head. 

"Uh no we're her friends, but it's practically the same thing," Zoe answers, stepping forward and taking over. 

 

"Is she okay? Can we see her?" she asks. 

 

"She is fine. She just had a dislocated shoulder and a minour concussion but other than that, both mother and baby are perfectly fine." 

The sigh of relief that I was breathing out is cut short as my brain registers what the doctor has just said. Did I hear that correctly?

"Mother and...baby?" I ask and she nods. 

"Yes. I'm sorry I thought you were aware. The patient is pregnant,"

 

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a build up so hold on to your horses it's about to get rough ❤️
> 
> So sorry for the delay I've been typing faster than I can update 😅❤️
> 
> XOXO   
> 💜💜

[Ana]

 

The distant sound of the hustle and bustle of the hospital slowly comes to the forefront of my mind as I wake up. My head feels foggy and my mouth is horribly dry but other than that I feel fine. As reality comes back my hands fly to my stomach and I start to panic. Taking deep breaths I try to connect with my inner self and then suddenly there it is... That little flutter deep inside me that fills me with a warmth I can't quite explain. I sigh out relieved as the sound of beeping heart monitors is drowned out by sound of my babies heart ringing in my ears. I know you're probably thinking it's all in my head but for an almost mother who was on the verge of losing the one shred of life that over night has become the single reason for her to live, that heart beat isn't imaginary its a life line.

 

"Don't worry, you're baby is OK." Zoe says, startling me out of my impromptu meditation session.

"Zoe you're...wait did you just say my baby?" I ask wide eyed and she nods confirming my worst nightmare.

"How did you.."

"The doctor told us. We were all here waiting to see you. The gangs still all outside actually...Well, almost all of us,"

She says and bites her lower lip.

"Aaron?" I ask, my nightmare suddenly becoming worse. She nods without making eye contact and I feel my heart sink to the pitt of my stomach. I've lost him. I know I have. Even if he can forgive me for the baby he'll never forgive me for lying to him about it. I can't hold back the tears and Zoe hugs me as they fall.

"I'm sorry Ana. This is all my fault. If I hadn't stormed out the way I did, if I'd just listened to you then none of this would have happened."

 

I breathe and calm myself down before I answer. 

"No, Zoe it's not your fault. It's mine. I shouldn't have entertained a relationship with one of your exs. That's against girl code and I completely understand..."

"Girl code? Is that what you think this is about?" she asks and I look at her puzzled.

"Isn't it?"

"No Ana, it's not," she shakes her head and takes a seat next to me on the bed.

"I'm not mad at you cause you're dating Aaron. Gosh no. Him and I were just a fling. Ancient history, plus I have Luca now."

"Then why were you upset?"

"I was upset because you felt like you couldn't tell me. You're like my sister Ana, we should be able to tell eachother everything. Especially the big stuff, like I'm dating your one time crush or I'm gonna be a mom," she explains and I suddenly feel incredibly stupid and guilty.

"I'm so sorry." I croak out, the tears returning to my eyes.

"Apology accepted. And I'm sorry that I nearly got you and your little bundle of joy run over,"

"Its OK. All water under the bridge now."

 

She hugs me tightly and I hug her back just as tight. Part of me is relieved and grateful that both my baby and my relationship with my best friend are safe. The other part of me is screaming in panic and dreading the invitabe moment when Aaron and I come face to face.

 

[Aaron]

 

The doctor told everyone that Ana was still asleep but that we coud see her if we'd like. Still recovering from the bomb she'd just dropped on me I took my leave. Zoe tried to come after me but I told her that I needed a breather and she understood. I walked around in the cold night air trying to get the billions of thoughts flying around my mind in order. I felt like I was being psychically attacked but I welcomed the flood of questions, it was better than feeling. I knew that the minute I sat down and collected my thoughts, the minute it all made sense then the hurt would set in. Which brings me to my current situation. Sitting alone, in the dark, by a fountain in a deserted park with nothing but the sound of the water and the crickets to keep me company. The gym is closed right now, its almost 10pm, so getting a few rounds in with a punching bag is out of the question. So what are my options?

 

None apparently. She made that clear to me. She took the choice away from me when she lied about the baby. Our baby. There were only two possible explanations for that. Either the baby isn't mine, which I've already ruled out as impossible, or she doesn't trust me enough to believe that I'd make a good father. That's the only possible explanation there is. She was going to give our baby up for adoption cause she doesn't think I'm ready to handle it. She thinks I'm gonna abandon her like every other common Tom, Dick and Harry out there. Does she not know me at all? Did this last year we spent together not tell her anything about the type of person that I am? That I would never leave her in a situation like this? That I lover her so fucking much I couldn't imagine anyone else carrying my seed?

 

Was our connection just in my head? Was it all a fantasy I made up in my damaged, love hungry mind? I pass my hand over my face in frustration and breathe. So many questions not enough answers. And in that moment of silence it happens. The pain begins to sink in. The betrayal cuts through me like a knife inflicting a wound so deep I doubt I'll ever be able to stitch it back together. I tighten my hands into fists at my side and scream, letting out my frustrations and my moment of vulnerability into the night to be carried by the wind, destined to forever remain a secret. 

 

She lied to me. She doesn't trust me. She doesn't love me. She's giving up my baby.

 

These are the thoughts that play on a loop in my mind as I sprint back to campus, the rush of adrenaline helping to ease out my anger. These are the thoughts that haunt me at night when I roll in bed without sleep. And these are the very thoughts that lead me to her building the next morning where I wait for her at the door to her apartment. The elevator dings on her floor and she steps out with Zoe wearing a smile that soon dissappears from her face when she notices me waiting. She knows I know.

Zoe's face tells me that she understands the gravity of the situation but for some reason she won't back down and walks with Ana up to the door.

"Aaron, can't this wait? She literally just got out of the hospital." Zoe says, taking her nursing job very seriously.

"It's OK Z. I owe Aaron an explanation," Ana says before she walks in and I follow her to her bedroom.

"OK but take it easy in there!" we hear Zoe call out after us before she shuts the door and turns to look at me.

"We should talk," she says.

"My sentiments exactly," I answer coldly as I take a seat on the bed and wait for her to pleade her case. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the continuation of that ansgty chapter everyone so I'd be careful while I read if I were you. Tissues are advised.😭
> 
> June is just around the corner but at the same time it seems a thousand years away. Waiting is the worst but we gotta live through it. 😢💜
> 
> For now enjoy the chapter....well as much as you can I guess. 😖👀
> 
>  
> 
> XOXO  
> 💜🖤

Ana's heart is hammering in her chest and the silence fills the space between them as she tries to figure out what to say. He notices the nervous crease in her brow and his hand itches to hold her and tell her that's its going to be alright but his wounded pride speaks louder so he simply looks away. She feels a jab in her chest when he looks away. He used to take every opportunity he could get to look at her and his eyes were always filled with longing and care when he did. Now, when he looks at her all she sees is hurt. That's what she is to him, not the love of his life but the woman who betrayed his trust.  
"Look Aaron I'm sorry that I lied to you. I just, I panicked and I didn't know what to say so I went with the first words that popped into my head," she apologised but he remained unmoved with his gaze trained on the tiled floor infront of him.  
"When did that happen? When did your first instinct towards me become a lie?" He asked his voice steady and cold. His words hit her like a slap across the face and she tentatively walks further into the room, stopping at what she deems to be a safe distance.  
"It's not like that Aaron, I was just scared. I didn't know how you'd react and I didn't think you deserved to have your life ruined by a choice I made. Just because I decided to keep the baby doesn't mean you should automatically want it too." she says and her words sting his already bruised ego.

What type of a monster does she think he is that would ask her to commit such a heinous crime.   
"You see that's the problem right there. The minute you found out you were pregnant you should have come to me. This wasn't just your decision. That baby is mine too Analissa. This is a team effort not a solo project," he let's out, his voice shaking in his attempt to keep it even and not scream at her.   
Her eyes well up. She knew it. He doesn't want the baby. Her anger rises at the thought of what might of happened if she'd told him earlier and tears sting the back of her eyes.   
"Aaron I'm sorry but whether I'd told you or not, I never would have aborted my baby. That's not the kind of girl I am," she says in a steady tone.   
"I know it's not and I never would have asked you to!" his voice breaks as he can no longer keep all his emotions bottled in. He takes a few deep breaths before he continues.  
"Ana it's not your baby, it's our baby and as much of a shock as this might be to you I actually want it," he confesses and her eyes widen with surprise making him feel worse. She really doesn't know him at all.   
"You, you what?" she stammers, taking a seat on the bed but still maintaining a safe distance.   
"When I first asked you if you were pregnant yesterday I wanted you to say yes. I was ready to drop everything and dedicate my life to you and our child permanently. I pictured us having a life together, white picket fence and all. That's how much I love you Ana, and the fact that you're carying my baby only makes me love you more," he confesses and she let's the tears fall as she realises just how much she messed up.

"But now," he starts and she braces herself for what his about to say. He looks at her and his heart tightness, how can you love a person so indefinitely and still find yourself questioning what your worth is to them? What kind of sick, twisted game was life playing at?

"Who am I Ana? To you, who am I?"  
She's taken aback by his question, unsure what to answer. Her first thoughts are that he's the love of her life but after all this she isn't sure that's the answer he wants to hear.  
"You're the man that I love Aaron. The father of my child," she says instead.  
"Then why did you not come to me. Why weren't your first thoughts about how this baby could mean a solidified future for us. When during our one year together did I give you the impression that my reaction would be anything other than pure support for you and happiness for the both of us?" He asks, the pain audible in his voice. She think back on their relationship and realises that he's right. If anything he showed her excatly how he felt about her. He always made sure to let her know that he'd catch her no matter the fall.

Then it hits her. She acted out of fear not love. She was the one not ready to have a baby but she ended up projecting her insecurities on to him. She was the one who felt like her life was over but after hearing her babies heart beat for the first time she fell in love with it instantly and felt guilty for her earlier thoughts so she created a story in her mind that he was the one who would feel like he no longer had a future. It was all in her head.  
"I'm sorry Aaron. I'm so sorry. I was scared and confused and I didn't know what to think and I felt alone..." she rambles on.

Alone. She felt alone. So he really did mean that little to her. The realisation shatters his heart into pieces and he feels like his world is crumbling down around him.   
"I've heard enough," he says then stands up to leave but she kneels down before him with tears in her eyes and pleads.  
"Please don't go. Please Aaron don't leave me. We can work this out, please. I love you," she sobs, she feels like he's holding a lose thread to the fabric of her life and if he walks out that door he'll pull it and it will all unravel infront of her.  
"I love you too Ana. More than you'll ever know and that's what hurts the most. Because when you found out you were pregnant you felt alone not closer to me. When I asked you about it your first instincts were to lie to me not trust that I loved you enough to stay by your side and figure things out with you. All that tells me is that you don't know me, that you don't trust me enough to be honest with me. That you don't have enough faith in me to take risks with me. I guess it's true what they say, in relationships there's always one person who loves deeper. Now we know who that is between the two of us." He says then steps around her and walks towards the door.  
"Don't leave me Aaron. Baby please," she begs and seeing the strong woman he's grown to love reduced to a sobbing mess on the floor is almost enough to make him turn around and take her into his arms. But the wound's still new, and the heartache still excruciatingly painful so with a deep beath he walks away pulling the thread he doesn't know he has as he leaves.

Ana watches him walk away feeling completely powerless as her life comes undone before her very eyes. He leaves without closing the door behind him and all she can do is sit there and wonder if she'll ever see him walking back in or if this is goodbye for good.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've changed this a little and made it third person narritve but it's just until the crisis is resolved then I'll go back to first. I hope this doesn't confuse anyone and if it does I'm really sorry. I just think that this way makes it easier for me to express what both characters are feeling on a slightly different level.👀👀👀😍
> 
>  
> 
> I might be taking a break from writing to focus on school but it's just a thought for now so please don't panic 💜💜
> 
>  
> 
> Hope you enjoy the chapter 
> 
> XOXO   
> 🖤💜

[4th month] 

 

[Ana] 

 

It’s been almost two weeks since Aaron last spoke to her and as they inch closer to their one year anniversary Ana grows more and more certain that she’s lost him forever. She’s sitting in bed right now, rubbing her partially swollen belly and looking at an old photo of the two of them that’s blurred out by her tears. It’s almost like her body is accepting his absence faster than her heart, her eyes no longer see him, her lips no longer remember his touch, her body has pushed down the memory of his warmth but her heart… her heart still beats like a jack hammer in her chest when she wakes up in the middle of the night startled by a night mare that she’s lost him only to find that the nightmare is all too real. Her heart still swells each time the doorbell rings hoping that it’s him. Her heart still sings that love song she hoped would be eternal, screaming out the tune to make up for the void once filled by his. Her body is moving on because it still holds a part of him in it. It’s fighting to keep the single link between them alive. But her heart, her heart is still questioning… Is it really all over? Could the one person that completed her really be gone? Had she really pushed the love of her life away? 

 

It is all she can do not to sink into a self-hating depression. She has to fight it, she has to keep her spirits up if for nothing more than the health of her unborn child. She presses the delete button and the oh-so familiar notification pops up. Are you sure you want to delete this image? Is she sure? Is she really ready to erase a year’s worth of the greatest memories of her life? Is she ready to let go?

 

A knock on the door saves her from having to make the inhumane decision and she dabs at her eyes and asks the person to come in. Zoe pop’s her head in and with her famous “you have to love me smile” she says, 

 

“Well since you won’t come out to feed my future God child, I have made it my personal mission to bring you anything and everything until you eat something.” She comes out from behind the door holding a pizza box and brings it to her. Zoe appointed herself the baby’s future God mother and has been taking care of Ana since she got back from the hospital. Who knew she had it in her?

 

“Ta da! Pineapple pizza! I read somewhere that sweet and savoury is like a super common craving so I thought come on who doesn’t love pineapple pizza?” Zoe opens the box and after one look at it Ana is hit with the memory of her and Aaron’s first kiss. No longer being able to retain her tears she starts to cry. Her body quakes with the force of her sobs as her heart ache is squeezed out of her in every single tear. 

 

“It’s ok. It’s ok. I’ll get you another Pizza.” Zoe says, putting the box down on the night stand then sitting down on the bed and pulling her emotional friend into her arms. 

 

“He’s gone Zoe. I pushed him away.” Ana sobs out, each word forced out with a strained breath. It hurts. Everything hurts. Breathing hurts, thinking hurts, crying hurts, just… living in general hurts. She’s one great big ball of pain and as much as she tries to hide it she can’t trick herself forever. She knows that her heartache is probably bad for the baby and the fact that she can’t shut it out to protect him/her makes her feel like a complete failure. 

 

“He’s not gone Ana. He’s just hurt. I bet you he's feeling like he did something wrong to get that secretive reaction out of you.” Zoe says. 

 

“What make you say that?” Ana sobs as she wipes the tears from her eyes and tries to take deep breaths. 

 

“Well, mostly because that’s how I felt. I kept wondering what I could have possibly done wrong to make you not trust me.” Zoe confesses.

 

“It made me realise that in situations like these people don’t get angry at you for omitting the truth, they simply use that anger to conceal the pain they feel over the fact that they weren’t good enough or didn’t mean enough to you for you to share your secrets with them.”

 

“Zoe I…”

 

“It’s ok Ana. I get it. I know that you didn’t mean to. I mean that’s a conversation I wouldn’t even know how to start.” Zoe gives her a sympathetic smile successfully making Ana feel worse about herself. In her attempt to keep everyone close to her unharmed she ended up making them question how much they mean to her. 

 

“I’m so sorry Zoe.” She whispers and Zoe shakes her head.

 

“You’ve already said that and I’ve already told you that I forgive you. And Aaron will too. You know when I saw the way he stood by your side that day and the look he had in his face when we met him at the hospital. He really loves you and a love like that doesn’t just disappear overnight. He’s not the type of guy who gives up on what he believes in and I know for a fact that he believes in this relationship with you. He just needs to cool down and remember that.” 

 

Ana wipes away the rest of her tears and gives Zoe a weak but genuine smile. 

 

“Thanks Zoe.” She chuckles. “When did you get so wise?” 

 

“Let’s just say I have an expert relationship guru. You might know her Dr Torres? She’s phenomenal.” They share a laugh and Ana feels her spirits begin to lift. She might not have the love of her life (for now) but she still has her best friend and for the moment that’s all she needs. 

 

“I’ll let you get some rest and I’ll leave this pizza in the kitchen in case you get hungry later.” Zoe gets up and makes her way to the door but Ana stops her. 

 

“Zoe wait. I uh…I have a doctor’s appointment on the 27th,” she states not missing the significance of the date. 

 

“It’s a new gynaecologist and I’m not really familiar with the area and…”

 

“I’ll be there.” Zoe answers for her with a reassuring smile and Ana feels a wave of relief washing over her. Zoe leaves and Ana returns to her resting position. Her back against the headboard with her legs crossed and her hands on her belly, she’s starting to show and there’s something frighteningly exciting about that. It’s evidence of the new life growing inside her but simultaneously makes her pregnancy all too real. She smiles down at her growing belly and caresses it gently as she realises that she has one more apology to make.

 

“Perdona tu mama mi amor (Forgive your mom my love). I’m sure you’ve realised that your papa is mad at me and that it’s made me feel a little sad. Ok a lot sad. But I don’t want you to worry. All I need you to do is grow healthy and strong. I’ll take care of the rest ok?” Ana sighs out loud as she is suddenly filled with an uncontrollable longing to have her baby in her arms. 

 

“Te quiero mi amor.” (I love you my love.) She whisper’s before she rolls her head back, closes her eyes and hums out the tune to Que Sera Sera. 

 

On the outside Zoe has just hit send on a text that reads:

 

_Aaron I know that you’re probably still mad at Ana but I know that you love her and whether she lied about it or not that is YOUR child she’s carrying. The two of you are running against an unpredictable baby clock and you need to make amends before it’s too late. I’m taking Ana to the gynaecologist for a check up on the 27th, I’ll text you the details once I know more. Be there. For your babies sake._

 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is personally one of my favourite chapters from this story cause its kinda cute 😍💜
> 
> Still in third person but it will get sorted soon 💜🖤 
> 
> June is just around the corner 😍 can't wait!!!
> 
> Enjoy the chapter 💜   
> XOXO  
> 💜🖤

[Aaron]

He reads the text for the 5th time before he throws the cell phone across the room where it lands with a soft thud on the sofa opposite him. He’d been readying and re-reading that text, looking for some indication that Ana had something to do with it but every clue led to a dead end.  

“Whoa man. What up with the rage?” Vivek asks, settling down beside him with a can of soda in hand.

“Nothing.” Aaron mutters but his tense posture and closed expression says otherwise.

“For real? We’re going back to keeping secrets now?” he presses and Aaron turns to face him then with a defeated look he leans back into the couch and presses his intertwined fingers over his eyes.

“It’s Ana isn’t it?” Vivek questions and Aaron just sighs out in response.

“Look man. She lied to you about something huge, and that’s not cool I get it, but you need to put yourself in her shoes too. I mean imagine you woke up one day and found out you were pregnant.”

At that Aaron takes his hands away from his eyes and turns towards him with a raised eyebrow, his face saying ‘seriously?’

“Ok bad example but my point is everything in her life was about to change and she was scared. People do stupid things when they’re scared.”

“I get that she was scared Vivek but that’s exactly why she should have come to me. I’m her boyfriend, I’m supposed to be her safe haven, her rock. She’s supposed to trust me with anything. I haven’t been able to sleep for two weeks cause I keep wondering what on earth I could have done to not make her feel safe or to give her the impression that I’m the type of guy that would pull a conceive and leave.” Aaron sighs out in frustration once again then curls in on himself, resting his chin in his hands with his elbows digging into his thighs.

“Like I said people do stupid things when they’re scared and it has nothing to do with you. Have you thought about the fact that maybe she needed to sort things out for herself first? I mean this is Ana we’re talking about she probably didn’t want to come to you until she had a game plan for the next five years mapped out.” Vivek takes a casual sip of his drink, clearly un-phased by the situation. To him it’s all just common sense.

“But that’s our baby not just hers. We’re supposed to be mapping that game plan out together.”

“Dude. You’re dating a control freak who lost control. She wanted to get some of it back is that really all that bad? Look, all I’m saying is that she made a mistake and right now you have the chance to fix it. You really wanna be a part of your child’s life?” Vivek asks seriously and Aaron nods in response.

“Then don’t let one stupid mistake made out of fear get in the way of that. You have the chance to be there for both your baby and your baby mama cause let’s be honest you’re beyond whipped. So just forgive her already and be by her side alright?” Vivek leaves without waiting for an answer and Aaron starts to wonder whether he and Zoe planned all of this to get Ana and him back together. He did make a good point though. Pregnancy can be both scary and beautiful all at once and the more time he spends wallowing in his betrayal the less time he’ll get to spend watching his baby grow. And if he’s being completely honest with himself every fibre of his being is screaming for her. He dove first into the school year, pounding through paper after paper in an attempt to get her out of his mind but it was no use. As soon as his mind was free her face would pop into his thoughts and no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t shake her out of his system. It wasn’t just the physical, it was the spiritual and the emotional. As much as he missed holding her in his arms and seeing her eyes light up when she laughed, he missed telling her that he loved her and the sense of security and home that came from being around her.  That’s partly how he knows that she’s the one, no matter how hurt he is at her he can’t deny how much he needs her. It’s like he doesn’t feel alive unless he’s around her. He closes his eyes and takes a few deep breaths, coming to terms with what happened and realising that his love for her is more important that the mistake she made. He reaches for his phone and texts Zoe back.

I’ll see you there, but don’t tell her anything. I want it to be a surprise.

[A few days later…]

Ana wakes up on the morning of the scheduled appointment with mixed emotions battling it out inside her. On the one hand she was excited, she finally gets to know the sex of her baby. On the other hand she’s heartbroken because today is her and Aaron’s one year anniversary and she isn’t even sure if there still is a her and Aaron. With a sigh she shakes the gloom away and gets herself ready for the day. With a pair of black tights and an over sixed (yet fashionable) mustard yellow sweater dress on she walks out of the room to meet Zoe and is surprised to see that she isn’t there. Instead she finds Nomi crunching away on a bowl of cereal and she directs one of those scrunched up “I have food in my mouth” smiles at her.

“Well someone’s looking chipper. What’s cookin’ good lookin’? You know besides your bun in the oven?” she asks, pointing her spoon at Ana’s concealed belly.

“Good morning to you too Nomi and if you must know me and my baby are fine thank you.”

“Oh no. You’re having a mood swing. And…that’s my cue to leave.” She jokes. For someone who’s never been pregnant, she sure has a lot of pregnancy jokes.  Just the other day she put a bucket next to Ana when they were watching T.V and said that it was just in case Ana got sick, that way she wouldn’t have to waddle all the way to the bathroom. ‘I do not waddle!’ Ana thought to herself but deep down she couldn’t help but laugh.  

“Ha, ha very funny missy. Hey have you seen Zoe?” she asks and Nomi shakes her head no.

“Haven’t seen her all day but she went out and she’ll meet you at your doctor’s appointment.”

Ana looks at her confused and says, “I thought you said you haven’t seen her all day.”

“Yeah that’s right.” Nomi answers un-phased.

“So you know all this how?”

“It’s on the note she left you right there on the counter. Wow pregnancy really makes you slow.” Nomi says, walking away into her bedroom. Ana rolls her eyes then picks up the note from the counter and it reads:

_Had to run out this morning but I won’t be long. Go without me and I’ll meet you there._

Strike two on the list of disappointments. She’s one strike away from getting a large tub of ice cream and hiding out in her room till tomorrow. As she turns around she catches her reflection in the window and smiles, reassuring herself that everything will be alright. With a bounce back in her step she makes her way out into the street. As she tries to call an Uber, Vivek conveniently drives by.

“Hey Ana, where are you headed?” he asks way too casually.

“Hi…um I’m actually on my way to the doctor.”

“Hop in I’ll give you a ride.” He jerks his head and she looks at him stunned for a moment before she accepts his offer and walks in.

“Thank you.” She says as she buckles her seat belt and he pulls away from the curb.

“Sure no problem, just doin’ my part.”

“Doing your part? For what?” she asks and he grows nervous.

“Um, uh of a friend. Yeah, my part as friend.” He answers quickly, sounding like his trying to convince himself of that.

“Ookay…” she slurs puzzled. They fall into an awkward silence and Vivek turns on the radio in an attempt to fill it. Eventually Ana starts a conversation under the guise of giving him direction and they engage in small talk till they reach her destination.

“Thanks for the ride V.”

“No problem A. Have fun in there.”

“Um… thanks, I’ll try. See yah.” She waves him goodbye then stands on the side walk as she processes what just happened. With a smile and a shake of her head she walks into the clinic and is shocked by what she finds inside.

 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little sweeter 😍💜
> 
> Enjoy shippers 💜
> 
> XOXO   
> 💜🖤

[Ana]

 

Her appointment is one of the first today and the waiting room is relatively quiet. That, she was expecting. What she wasn’t expecting was to see the twins standing in front of one of the consulting rooms like body guards. 

 

“What are you two doing here?” Ana asks wondering where the hell Zoe is. 

 

“That’s not important right now. Sky hand me your hand bag.” Jazz says while looking at Ana like she’s crazy. 

 

“You seriously couldn’t have slapped on some lipstick or something? And put your hair up we need to see your face.” The twins give Ana a last minute make-over complete with a high ponytail, red lipstick and just a little bit of mascara. 

 

“There. Now you’re ready.” Sky nods as her and her sister step back to admire they’re handy work. 

 

“Not that I don’t appreciate your concern with my image but um…what exactly does the way I look have to do with my doctor’s appointment?”

 

The girls exchange mischievous grins and step away from the door to give Ana access to the room. 

 

“See for yourself.” They grin and Ana gives them both a sceptical look before she steps inside.  The little consulting room is warm and inviting. As soon as you step through the door you come face to face with the ultra sound machine and a hospital bed. Your usual medical posters decorate the otherwise white walls and on the far right corner sits the doctor’s desk complete with a high back office chair. 

 

“Your 8 o’ clock is here.” They sing before they close the door behind Ana. She turns to look back at the desk just as the chair begins to spin in her direction to reveal a smartly dressed Aaron holding a bouquet of multi coloured roses. Her hands fly to her open mouth and her eyes widen in surprise. He stands up and walk around the table towards her giving her full view of him decked out in a black suit with a white button down shirt and (just because its Aaron) a pair of sneakers. 

 

“Aaron, what…what are you doing here?” she whispers once he’s standing only a short distance away from her with one hand holding the bouquet up and the other casually in his pants pocket. 

 

“You didn’t think I’d forget our anniversary did you?” he asks reaching his previously pocketed hand out to hers and intertwining their fingers. 

 

“I thought, I…” She stammers as her eyes tear up. 

 

“I messed up Ana. Big time. I was hurt and insecure and I let my anger get the best of me and I’m sorry for that. But once the dust settled and I could think clearly again I realised something.” He says, using his thumb to gently caress the back of her hand. 

 

“What’s that?” She manages to croak out and he smiles at her, releasing her hand and bringing his up to brush a stray tear from her face.

 

“That no matter what you do there isn’t a single instance in my life that I can picture without you in it. The memories I have of my life before you became faded, black and white pictures in the back of my brain. Dull and life less. Then I met you and you turned my life into this bunch of roses. You gave it colour and meaning again.” He explains before he brings his hand to the bouquet and from it takes a single yellow rose that he gingerly gives to her. 

 

“You painted my sun in yellow with your smile and with it became the light that guides me in my darkest hour.” From the rainbow of flowers in his arms, he gifts her one rose at a time. With each flower that goes from him to her come words of clarity as he describes how each and every colour symbolizes a part of Ana that made him fall in love with her. 

 

“You’ve added orange to the flames of desire with your perfectly sculpted curves that can twist and sway like fire in tune to any melody.” He grins and she feels her face heat up as she remembers her birthday last year when he took her out dancing. 

 

“White is for the clouds that like you are soft, pure, angelic and each joyous tear they shed nourishes a life.” He says with a shy smile and hands her the white rose. 

 

“Now red. Red is for the beating of my heart that seems to fade when you’re away. For the love I have for you and that defines me. For the blood, our blood that will run through our child’s veins nourishing and healing the very embodiment of our union.” He says and hands her the red rose with a tone of finality. 

 

“What about the pink one?” she asks, barely holding it together enough to speak. 

 

“This one…is gonna have to wait until after your appointment. Zoe told me that you’re finding out the sex today and this is my prediction.” He shrugs. She laughs as she walks into his arms and he embraces her. Suddenly all seems right in the world because she is finally where she is meant to be. In his arms. 

 

[Aaron] 

 

He closes his eyes and feels his pulse connect with hers. This is where he belongs. By her side. He realises that every word he has just said is true. His life is bland without her and now his view of himself is defined solely by how much of his love for her he can show. He makes a promise to himself (and secretly to her) that he will never let anything come between them again. He will be there for her through every excited smile and gruelling tear and he’ll love her no matter the circumstance. 

 

The doctor comes in, interrupting their intimate moment and offers them a sweet but apologetic smile. 

 

“Now isn’t this a touching seen?” She coos and the couple offers her a perfect set of bashful smiles. 

 

“I’m Dr. Parker, nice to meet you. Dr. Hannigan is a close friend of mine and she’s gotten me up to speed with your pregnancy. So far everything seems to be normal so how about we ensure that that’s still the case?” she asks kindly and Ana gives Aaron an excited (but nervous) smile before she heads over to the bed. When Ana lifts her sweater dress, revealing her slight bump, Aaron feels his heart beat quicken. It has suddenly dawned on him that this is the first time he’d be meeting his child. He walks closer to her as the doctor places the wand on her gelled belly and moves it around a little until … 

 

Boom – boom 

 

Boom – boom 

 

Boom – boom

 

The sound of their baby’s heart beat vibrates through him as each and every fibre of his being is consumed by a sudden, deep and unconditional love for his unborn child. His heart swells as his eyes begin to glimmer with emotion and Ana holds his hand, giving it a tight, reassuring squeeze. 

 

“That’s our baby. That’s our little angel.” He whispers as he looks at the screen and nothing in the world has ever looked so beautiful. 

 

“Yeah it is.” Ana chirps out, her voice riddled with emotion. 

 

“Well everything seems perfectly normal, heart beat is strong and growth is right on schedule.” The doctors reassures them. 

 

“Would you like to know the sex of your baby?” she asks with a smile and both parents-to-be affirm that they do. 

 

“Well…” she moves the wand around and says “Congratulations you are the parents of a healthy baby girl.” 

 

Ana closes her eyes as the tears flow down her contempt smiling face. She feels Aaron kneel down beside her and looks at him in time to catch him plant an ever so soft kiss on her hand before placing the pink rose in it. 

 

“This one is for the two most important girls in my life,” he whispers and she smiles down at him at a complete loss for words.

 

The doctor replaces the wand back in its holder and hands Ana a paper towel to wipe of the gel.

 

“Please. Let me.” Aaron offers and Ana lets him take the paper towel from her hand. She watches him as he wipes the gel off tenderly and once her belly is clean he leans down and plants a single kiss on it. His first show of pure affection to the life he created with the woman he is destined to always love.  

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof. Hi there shippers! This chapter is the reason why I included a maturity warning with the fic details so be warned. It spicy! Hope you like it and don't hesitate to comment 💜 yall are really quiet 😢
> 
>  
> 
> Have fun!  
> XOXO   
> 🖤💜

[Ana]

Aaron's fingers are interlinked with mine as we walk into the apartment. After the appointment the crew joined us for a celebratory breakfast but Aaron offered to take me home once he noticed that I was dozing off.

"Do you need anything?" he asks as I make my way to the bathroom.

"Just a warm shower to wash off the hospital smell. Could you please bring me my towel?" I ask and he nods happily before he vanishes into my bedroom. In the bathroom I crouch down in order to take off my sneakers but when Aaron walks in on me he rushes to my side worried.

"Woah. Slow down there mama. Let me help you."

"Come on Aaron. I'm still not pregnant enough to need your help taking off footwear." I whine playfully but he won't have it.

"Consider this practice for when you do. You're carrying our baby, focus on keeping that little girl safe and leave the rest to me." He winks and I can already tell that arguing will get me no where. To be honest I'm not really inclined to argue, I find it sweet that he wants to help and because I know Aaron I know that this is his way of being there for both the baby and me.  
He slips both my shoes off then helps me stand and tenderly helps me undress. Nothing about his actions suggest that he is being motivated by anything besides genuine love and concern but something about that turns me all the way on. Blame it on the hormones or the two weeks we've spent apart, I don't really care. All I know is that right now he is too far away from me and wearing too many pieces of clothing.

"Wow." he exclaims, bringing my mind back from the indecent path it was traveling down.

"What?" I ask and when I look into his eyes I find them staring back at me with a hunger I haven't seen in almost four months.

"You look...incredible." He breathes and I feel my sex quiver. I'm instantly drenched.

"I feel even better." I whisper, taking his hand and placing it over my swollen breast. He takes in a sharp breath of air and withdraws from me taking a single step back. If it weren't for his compliment and the burning desire in his dilated pupils my ego would have sustained a serious blow. I know he wants me as much as I want him, so his restraint comes as a shock to me.

"Did I do something wrong?" I ask, startling him out of his staring match with my boobs. He looks up into my eyes like a man lost then blinks a few times and responds.

"No, no. You...You're perfect. I just don't want to risk hurting the baby." he says and I sigh out frustrated. Sexually frustrated.

"Baby, come on..." I say walking close to him but he takes a few more steps back,

"Ana, no. We need to be careful with these things. Unborn babies are some of the most sensitive beings on this earth and I couldn't live with myself if I pressed too hard, or put too much pressure on your stomach and hurt our little princess. We're both just gonna have to go without for a while OK?" he puts his foot down then right after he adds,

"Enjoy your shower. I'll be in the room if you need me," and with that he leaves.

I let out a disgruntled huff then step into the shower and turn the cold water on. The blast shocks my body out of its heated spiral but the relief is short lived. A light bulb goes off in my head and I turn the hot water on, blending the two until I reach a temperature just before scalding but much after luke warm. Once my body is heated up again I close my eyes and direct my hand to my sweet spot, imagining that Aaron is the one exploring my best kept secret. I strum my fingers gently over my hyper sensitive folds before I push forward with my index and middle fingers, my head falling back as a groan escapes my lips. My thumb works its magic on the outside, massaging my ailing treasure with gentle circular motions as I continue to gently press in, pull out and start all over. A small pool of pleasure builds up at the sweet spot between my legs and I perform each gesture with a growing urgency until finally a modest orgasm shakes through me.

I bring my coated hand up to the running water and watch as my juices drip down from it with the force of the water. Instead of satisfying myself I've successfully managed to worsen my hunger and the fact that I'm starving with a specimen of man only a few feet away makes my blood boil with irritation. Oh but he can't get away from me that easily. I will take what's rightfully mine and I feel incredibly sorry for the poor soul who tries to stop me.

* * *

 

[Aaron]   
  
I can't believe I made it out of that bathroom alive, let alone fully clothed. Ana was staring at me like a famished lioness would stare at unsuspecting prey... To be honest I didn't have much more will in me to fight. If she pushed a little harder I would have caved. The sudden tightening of my pants is proof of that. Ana has always been super sexy. I remember that after the first time (well first couple of times) we met eachother in a sexual way I kept wondering how on earth I'd resisted her for that long. Now I'm here in her room, with a raging hard on and asking myself why I went there in the first place. I don't think pussy whipped is adequate enough a term to describe my situation. I was about ready to upgrade her to wifey status on our second night together but seeing her rock her baby mama bod' did things to me that I can't quite put into words.

I close my eyes and try to meditate my member into submission but at the sound of the door opening I look up and Ana walks in, soaking wet, with nothing but a towel wrapped around that sinful body of hers. So much for calming little A.

"Oh Aaron." she coos in a sultry manner that has me feeling all kinds of ways.

"Ye...Yes baby?" I stutter.

"Would you be a dear and help me towel down?" she puckers her lips and I immediately catch on to her game. She wants to drive me crazy. I nod my head, not risking a spoken response, and say a little prayer of strength in my mind as she approaches me. She let's the towel fall to the ground and addresses me in all her naked glory.

"Oops," she teases sending a set of uncontrollable chills up and down my spine, I kneel down to pick up the towel but before I can stand up she kicks me down with her delicate foot and climbs on top of me, claiming my lips in hers. I feel my will begin to slip away as her tongue darts inside my mouth and I taste the minty flavour of her toothpaste. She grinds on my concealed erection and a strained groan escapes me. Her belly bumps into me and as I remember the baby I find the strength to pull away.

"Ana we can't."

"Yes we can Aaron. I've read my fair share of pregnancy books and as long as we're careful we can have sex until I enter my third trimester. Now shut up and kiss me." she blurts before attacking my lips once again.

"Ana, Ana hold on." I pull away yet again.   
"You said if we're careful and you more than anyone should know that I can't control myself around you."

"It will be alright baby." She says in a reassuring tone.

"Just let me take the lead OK?" she asks. I give her naked body a once over and can't deny my need any longer. I respond with a famished kiss and she gasps surprised but clearly turned on by it. Without breaking apart I some how manage to lift us both up then sit her down on the bed and kneel infront of her. I pull my lips away from hers and trail a path down her neck, leaving evidence of my passion along the way. My mouth hungrily tastes one of her breasts and Ana whimpers out in pleasure. She places one hand on my back and one hand on my head, almost as if she were nursing an infant and I suck greedily, playing the part. I move from one breast to the other giving them my undivided attention till her nipples grow hard, all the while my fingers work on her neither regions making her wetter with each heated touch.

"Take off your clothes," she demands breathless and I pull away from her to follow her command. As soon as I'm bare she grabs me by the waist, pulls me down on the bed and straddles my waist. Her lips meet mine in a fiery embrace as her delicate hands snake their way down to my aroused shaft, gliding up and down the length of me with a determined amount of force. I quiver beneath her and my hands explore her baby soft skin. She aligns my member with her entrance then slowly sinks down, swallowing me entirely. A moan shakes out of me as I feel her adjusting to me before she lifts herself up and sinks back down. I grab hold of her hips in order to steady her as she rides me mercilessly. She gradually increases her speed and I feel the ecstasy build as I get closer and closer to that blissful climax. She stiffens on top of me, finding her release, then somehow finds the strength to grind on me till I'm consumed by my own wave of pleasure.   
She falls on top of me, breathless and I kiss the top of her forehead, amazed by what she had just accomplished.

"You're incredible you know that?" I compliment as I move a damp strand of hair from her face.

"Oh I've always known. I was just waiting for you to catch on." She sasses out. I chuckle then lift her chin so that our gazes meet.

"I love you." I say and she kisses me tenderly.

"I love you too." she answers before she gets off of me and turns around so that I can spoon her in my arms. I caress her belly and hold her as she sleeps, all the while my one and only thought is that no one has ever been as happy as I am right now.

 

 


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey yall 😍
> 
> Hope yall liked the previous chapter, it was.... Spicey to say the least, but don't worry this one is breather, sort of. 😂   
> Grownish is back and that first episode has me about ready to throw my TV off a balcony. My heart can't handle all that 😭😭  
> I'll be starting exams this coming week so my updates may suffer but I'll try my best to keep them up to speed 💜
> 
> Cliffhanger warnings apply but besides that enjoy the chapter 😍  
> XOXO  
> 🖤💜

[5th month - Ana] 

I straighten out my white Maxi dress as Aaron rings the door bell and we both wait for someone to answer. He's holding on to my hand to stop me from nervously tapping it against my side but its doing very little to actually calm me down. 

"Babe, you need to relax." he whispers, bending down to plant a kiss on my cheek. 

"Easy for you to say. You're not the one meeting your boyfriends parents for the first time while already expecting. Not exactly my definition of a great first impression." I breathe out. 

"They're going to love you. Trust me." he reassures me but before I can tell him that he has a biased opinion the door opens and a slightly taller, older version of Aaron smiles at us from the newly opened door. 

"There he is!" he exclaims with a hearty laugh as he pulls Aaron in for a papa bear hug. 

"How are you dad?" Aaron asks his face taking on a softer smile I haven't quite seen as yet. Clearly it's a look reserved just for family. It's endearing, I think, and find myself wondering if that's the same smile he'll have on his face when he meets our little girl. 

"I'm good, I'm good despite the creaks and cracks here and there." He answers. 

"That's old age Dad." Aaron jokes as they pull apart and his father squints his eyes at him playfully,

"Don't mess with me boy, I can still kick your ass." he laughs and Aaron joins in. 

 

"Oh my. Excuse me ma'am. Who is this lovely little flower?" he turns his attention to me and plants a gentle kiss on the back of my hand. 

 

"This is Analisa Torres," Aaron smiles down at me and my tummy fills with little butterflies. 

 

"Mmm. With that look in his eyes I presume you'll soon be a Jackson," his father winks at me and I feel my cheeks flush. 

 

"Nice to meet you Ms Torres I'm Samuel, Aaron's father, please come inside." He moves to make room for us to step in and I smile going in first. Aaron picks up our bags and follows me inside. 

 

"Nice to meet you Sir and please call me Ana."  

 

"Only if you drop the Sir. Deal?" he asks and I chuckle, 

 

"Deal." 

 

The men engage in a conversation about our flight here as we make our way down a corridor of photographs depicting several moments in their lives. Their conversation fades to the background as I take in the story on display. There's a picture of a younger Mr Jackson smiling down at a beautiful bride (who I'm assuming is Aaron's mother) and she smiles back with just as much joy in her eyes. He's cradling her in his arms from behind and she's beaming up at him like nothing and no one on earth could ever make her happier. 

A few steps down the line the woman makes yet another appearance but this time she's sitting down cross legged on a beach lovingly looking down at her baby bump. I hault infront of this one, drinking the image in with my curious eyes. Her wet curls blow behind her in the black and white depiction and she's glowing with a serene happiness that for the very first time since I can remeber I find myself relating to. 

 

I've always thought that pregnancy is a magical stage in a woman's life. Despite the aches and discomforts that come with it, there seems to be something inexplicable about creating and growing a life within you. I've always looked at images like this one and simply found them breathtaking but now I find myself reaching for my own swollen stomach as my heart swells with an empathetic warmth. Aaron wraps his arms around me from behind, intertwining his fingers with mine over my pregnant tummy and resting his chin on my shoulder. 

 

"She's beautiful," I breathe out and he plants a kiss on my cheek. 

 

"So are you." He says with his face still pressed against the side of mine. 

 

"Isn't this precious?" His father observes bringing us both back from our little bubble. 

 

"I'm sorry," I chuckle and he shakes his head. 

 

"Don't apologise my dear." He comes closer to us and looks at the image on the wall, his features taking on a distant and reminiscent look. 

 

"This picture was taken on Aaron's due date, exactly a week from the day he was actually born." He chuckles. 

 

"Melinda, my wife, kept insisting that she wanted our baby to born close to the sea so we drove down to the beach, checked into a hotel that was an equal distance from the sandy shores and the hospital then we spent our day at the beach waiting for her to get her first contraction. Needless to say that contraction never came. We waited for two more day's before ultimately giving up and returning home. The weekend after that we rushed to the hospital in the middle of the night and came back a family of three." He looks at Aaron with a fatherly gaze and I feel myself grow emotional at the overwhelming amount of love present between the two of them. 

 

"Come on. Let's go see if your mother is ready for us." He gives Aaron's shoulder a slight shake and we continue our journey down the hallway till we reach the end of the wall and step into an open space kitchen / dining room / living room. The woman from the photos has just placed a bottle of wine on the table and when she looks up at us her face lights up. 

 

"Aaron! You're home!" she squeals and speed walks to Aaron, wrapping her arms around him in a tight motherly hug. I grow a little teary eyed watching the expression of relief that floods her features as she holds her son in her arms again. 

 

"I've missed you." She says while closing her eyes and squeezing him tighter. 

 

"It's only been three months mom." he chuckles but ultimately hugs her back just as tightly. 

"I've missed you too." 

 

They reluctantly let go of eachother and she looks at him with wet eyes, placing a hand on his cheek. 

"What a handsome boy God gave me." She says and I nod my head in silent agreement. 

 

"I can agree with that." I say and she turns her attention towards me as if only noticing me for the first time. 

 

"Goodness where are my manners. I'm Melinda, Aaron's mom and you must be Analisa." She chuckles letting go of Aaron and bringing me in for a hug. It's a warm and inviting hug all though something feels a little off. I shake it off, blaming it on my nerves and flash her my biggest smile once we let go of eachother. 

 

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Jackson and please call me Ana." I answer kindly. She chuckles and swats the air with her hand saying, 

 

"Nonsense, Mrs Jackson is my mother in law. Please, Melinda will do just fine." an alarm goes off in the kitchen and she turns her head towards it. 

"That's the roast beef, I'm just letting the rice simmer down for a bit and dinner will be ready. Why don't you make yourself comfortable in the mean time sweety, you must be exhausted after the long flight." She says. 

 

"Oh don't worry about me Mrs... Melinda, I'm fine thank you. If you don't mind I'd actually like to help out in the kitchen." I offer but Aaron steps in before his mother can respond. 

 

"That's a definite no. You're going upstairs and having a long relaxing bath." 

 

"But Aaron..."

 

"Ana, I mean it. You need the rest." he says sternly and I swallow my protests. 

 

"It's best not to argue with him hun. Go on upstairs, I'll just check dinner and I'll be right up to help you alright?" Melinda offers and I smile at her gratefully. 

 

"Thank you and I'm sorry for all the trouble." 

 

"It's no trouble at all sweet heart, that's precious cargo your carrying there." Samuel reassures me. 

 

"And you are just as prescious. Come on, let's get you settled," Aaron adds on, picking up our bags and following me up the stairs. He leaves me in the bathroom to drop our bags off in our respective rooms then returns with fresh towels. 

 

"Aaron. You really should have let me help your mom. I don't think this is helping improve my standing with her." I say as he tests the temperature of the water then let's it fill the tub. I can't seem to shake the feeling that something is off with his mother, no matter how hard I actually try. 

 

"Ana you're pregnant and pregnancy is hard enough without you having to push yourself to the limit. I already told you, I'm gonna take care of you whether you want me to or not." he reassures me while lovingly rubbing my thighs. 

 

"And if my mom hated you, you would know. Both my parents are completely charmed by you and by the end of the night they'll love you as much as I do. Well, not exactly as much." he winks at me and my cheeks flush as Aaron gives me a quick hug and kiss on the forehead before he leaves me to my bath. He's right. I'm probably just worried over nothing. 

* * *

[Aaron] 

I go back down the stairs once I've made sure she has everything she needs. Ana hates how cautious I've been around her but I can't help myself. I feel so useless watching her get sick at all hours of the day and night and seeing the exhaustion in her beautiful eyes after the smallest of tasks. I can't take all that away but I can help her be more comfortable by not allowing her to over exert herself, by making sure she has everything she needs when she needs it and by being there for her no matter the circumstance. 

 

I find my parents in the kitchen. My mother is preparing a salad and my father is casually standing by, simply keeping her company. Another reason why I intervened before my mom could answer Ana's offer. If there's one thing Melinda Jackson hates it's having people in her kitchen while she's in there. It takes alot for her to trust someone enough to let them help her cook and judging by the conversation I've just had with Ana, her getting turned down by my mom would only make her feel more insecure. 

 

"How is she Aaron dear?" my mom asks when she looks up briefly and notices me there. 

 

"She's alright. A little nervous but fine. She just needs to relax." I answer. 

 

"Poor thing. We'll try our best to make her feel as at home as possible baby. She seems like a really sweet girl." My mom offers as she brings two freshly washed tomatoes to the chopping board. 

 

"She is. She's sweet and loving and the most...amazing dancer and when she smiles. Gosh I'd give the up world just to look at her smile all day." I blabber and my parents simply stare at me with shocked expressions. 

 

"Mel, I belive our boy's in love." my father says, crossing his arms and smiling at me knowingly. 

 

"I am...as a matter of fact," I say as I reach into my coat pocket, with my heart pounding in my ears, and pull out a small red velvet box. I open it, revealing the 1 carrat diamond ring inside. It's small and cheap but it's all I can afford for now. My parents eyes widen as they realise what it means, but just to make it perfectly clear I add, 

 

"She's the one." 


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been a while everyone. Haven't been keeping track of my updates. I'll do better though I promise 😭❤️❤️
> 
> Enjoy the chapter   
> XOXO  
> 💜🖤

[Aaron]

 

The knife slips from my mother's hand and lands on the counter with a clang. She stares at me with her mouth hanging open and her eyes just about ready to pop out of their sockets. My father looks just as surprised but soon a smile creeps over his features and his eyes begin to sparkle with that oh so familiar Jackson warmth. He makes his way towards me with a joyous laughter bursting from his chest and pulls me in for a hug.

"Oh so this is love, love?" he jokes giving me a playful nudge.

"Don't be silly Samuel. It's just infatuation, now Aaron darling be reasonable." my mom suggests, snapping out of her shock induced stupor.

"Infatuation? Mom. I'm not 16 anymore, Ana isn't just some girl I'm crushing on. She's the love of my life, the mother of my child. I want to make it official and I'd really appreciate it if you would support me on this."

"Baby, you know I support you. I always have and I always will I just..." She says and reaches out for me, holding my face between both her hands.

"I just want you to be sure that this is really what's best for you," something about the way she says it ignites a flame within me and it simmers just beneath the surface as I slowly pull myself away from her.

"Ana is what's best for me." I put my foot down.

 

"She's just a girl Aar..."

"Mom stop!" I finally snap.

"I love her mom. What about that don't you understand!"

 

"Aaron calm down, she's still your mother and Melinda stop pushing it. This is what he wants and he's old enough to make the decision." my father interferes, noticing how heated the situation is getting.

 

"Don't encourage this Samuel! I have the right to speak out when I think something isn't right and this isn't right!" she bursts, her face quickly tinting.

 

"Why mom? Why isn't this right? Because she's not Lila? Because this isn't what you had planned in your great big book of hopes and dreams? Well here's the thing mom, you can't put a time stamp on life, it will play out the way its meant to play out and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm done being your puppet. I lover her and I'm going to marry her and were going to have our family whether you're apart of it or not." I turn around to leave but my mom holds me back.

 

"Don't you walk away from me Aaron, I'm not finished with you!" she yells and he jerks his arm away from her aggressively.

 

"Well I am." he huffs and begins to walk towards the stairs.

 

"Aaron get back here! I won't let you do this! I refuse to let you tether yourself to some girl for a child that might not even be yours!" at that I stop dead in my tracks and turn around to face her.

 

"What did you just say?" I question, my voice taking on a dangerous tone.

 

"You heard me. I refuse to stand idly by and watch while you throw your life away over some...some.... Mistake!" she screams, the glimmer of held back tears staining her eyes.

 

I stare at her for a second, my eyes blazing with an untamed fury that's slowly beginning to take over. I study my mother's features and realise that they are foreign. The wild eyes, the pronounced veins, the shape of her clenched jaw. Somehow in the last 1 minute and a few seconds she's managed to erase 20 years worth of warmth and familiarity and replace it with this... Controlling, menacing creature I see before me. She's managed to eradicate the bond between mother and son with a single word: "Mistake".

 

I feel apart of me slip away. A part of me that wants to hold her and tell her that I'm sorry. A part of me that wants to hand over the ring simply to see the happiness restored to her pleading eyes. A part of me that is still seeking his mother's approval. In its place rises the father figure, the loving boyfriend and soon to be husband. The man who's soul purpose on earth is to protect, love and cherish his family. A sharp pain course's through my chest as I realise how likely it is that my family picture might not be complete. The blaze inside me begins to die out, suffocated by a new found maturity that ripples through my features and courses out of me in frightening waves of calm.

 

"Listen to me, and listen well because I'm only going to say this once. You're my mother and I love you. I've always loved you and no matter how hurt I am right now I know that a part of me always will. But don't you EVER, call my baby girl a mistake again. She's not a mistake. She's my reason for living. She's the reason why I've worked so hard all my life to try and change the world. All those talks at summer camps, trips to museums, political debate nights and long study sessions I pushed myself through. I did it all for her. So that she could be born into a better world than I was. So that she wouldn't have to see or experience the disgust that comes with being human. So she's not a mistake, she's a gift. A sudden and miraculous gift." I lecture, my growth reflected in my ability to be vulnerable. 

 

"Aaron baby, I..." my mother tries but I hold my hand up and silence her. My father stands at a safe distance watching as his son becomes the man his always known he could be. 

 

"Let me finish. As much as my obligation is to my daughter that's not why I want to marry Ana. I didn't dig into my savings earned with years of lawn mowing and chores just to get a ring simply because she's carrying my child. I did it because I realised that every second I spend away from her is agonising. I did because I found myself subconsciously memorising ever pattern and rhythm of her voice so that I could tell when she was upset and needed me and relsih that much more in her happiness. I did it because the mere thought of her smile can make me feel an inexplicable amount of joy in my heart. But most of all I did it because of the simple and unjustifiable fact that I love her and every time I look into her eyes I know that she loves me too. That's why I want to marry her. So that I can spend the rest of my life enjoying the feeling of being loved by her and finding a billion ways to show her how much I love her back." 

 

A sniffle echoes from behind me and I turn to find Ana standing and staring at me with wide teary eyes. Before I can say anything she runs towards me, jumping into my arms and kissing me with such overwhelming emotion that it almost feels like she's struggling to breathe and I'm her last chance at a breath of air. I kiss her back just as fervently, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her close. She comes up for air with a sob, her body trembling from the effort as we try to regain our breath. 

"I love you too Aaron. So so much." She whispers out, her voice still shaky. I wipe the tears away from her eyes and smile at her, my heart hammering out of my chest.  

 

"Aaron? Isn't there something you want to ask Ana?" my father pushes and I look back at him to find that his eyes are glossy with pride and happiness. He nods, giving me the go ahead and I turn towards Ana, as I'm about to go down on one knee my mother yells, 

"Wait!" 

I turn back around, ready to defend Ana but hold myself back as she steps towards me calmly, removing on of the two rings that keep her wedding band company. 

 

She places the jewel in my hand and closes my fingers around it then reaches out and caresses my face with her other hand. On her face she wears a teary smile and her eyes, like my father's radiate with pride and the realisation that her little boy isn't little any more. 

"I've always prayed that you'd experience the joy of loving and savour in the bliss that comes with being loved by someone unconditionally. I just never expected that it would be at such a young age," she sobs. 

"My little boy. My brave boy. My heart and soul in human form. I am so proud of the man you've become and the father you are growing to be. I love you Aaron, and I wish you both...all the happiness." 

 

My own eyes blur at the emergence of tears as both parts of me, the father and the son, come together and I am finally complete. I bend down and hug my mother, noting the incomparable feeling of home I get from being cradled in her arms. 

"Thank you ma." I whisper and she simply nods before she pulls back. 

"Now go on. Ask her. Ask the woman you love to be yours." she says, dabbing away at her eyes and backing away into my father's waiting embrace. He gives her a reassuring peck on the forehead and I smile at the gesture of kindness then turn around to face an overwhelmed Ana. She's barely holding on and a gasp trembles out of her as I bend down on one knee and hold my mother's (and previously my grandmother's) engagement ring out to her. 

 

"Analisa Patricia Torres. Eres la mujer de mi vida. La única mujer con la que quiero estar mientras viva y la única vista a la que quiero despertar por el resto de la eternidad. Ya me has bendecido por ser la madre de nuestra niñita. Ahora quiero pedirte egoístamente que me honres una vez más y aceptes ser mi esposa. ¿Entonces que dices? ¿Te casarías conmigo? (You are the woman of my life. The only woman I want to be with for as long as I live and the only view I want to wake up to for the rest of eternity. You've already blessed me by being the mother of our little girl now I want to selfishly ask that you honour me once again and agree to be my wife. So what do you say? Will you marry me?)" 

 

She sobs out a breath and nods her head ecstatically. 

"Sí. Una cantidad infinita de veces sí. (Yes. An infinite amount of times yes.)"

 

I slip the ring onto her finger and stand before dipping my lips on to hers. We seal our engagement with a kiss as my parents applause echo in the back ground and when we part I rest my forehead on hers while we try to slow our breathing down. 

 

"Te quiero mucho Aaron (I love you so much)" she whispers and I answer,

 

"Te quiero más Ana (I love you more)." 

 

 

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really need to keep track of these. Super sorry for being late. Here's a few chapters to make up for it!  
> 🤭🤭🤭🤭
> 
> Hope you like it 😍   
> XOXO💜

[Ana]

 

The ring on my finger glimmers in the early morning sunlight that streams in through the curtains and I smile down at it still trying to piece together what happened last night. It was so spontaneous yet so heart felt that I still get teary eyed when the details cross my mind. Aaron shifts positions behind me and I close my eyes as I feel his arm tighten around me. I link my fingers with his and he gives my hand a firm squeeze. A kiss on my shoulder soon follows.

"Good morning my queen." He greets and plants a kiss on my cheek and I smile back at him and answer, 

"Goodmorning baby." 

I turn around in his arms to face him and snuggle closer to him.

 

"How did you sleep?" he asks, pressing his lips to my forehead lovingly.

 

"Like our little Luna." I reply and wait for his reaction.

 

"Luna? As in the moon?" he asks and I nod.

 

"Don't you like it?" I question while looking up at him.

 

"I do, it's beautiful but I don't think our baby girl is a Luna." he answers thoughtfully.

 

"Oh really? So what do you have in mind for a name?" I ask but before he can answer my stomach rumbles.

 

"Breakfast first, then we can talk." he answers with a laugh.

 

"OK, good idea. Will you help me up please. I'll give you a hand." I offer but he shakes his head no and says,

 

"Breakfast in bed was completely implied in my previous statement and I'm pretty sure I can handle some scrambled eggs and toast," he winks then gets up to leave. I smile as he exits the door and manage to pull myself up so that my back rests against the head board.

 

"Oof, mi hija. You're getting heavier." I laugh as I lift up pj shirt and gently caress my exposed belly.

 

"Good morning sweet heart. How's mommy's special little girl? Did you sleep well?" I ask and close my eyes to tune myself into the little sound inside me that my heart knows is her. It takes a few deep breaths for me to centre myself but soon I tap into it and her heartbeat is there and vibrant.

"There she is," I whisper and continue rubbing my swelling stomach. The sound of the door opening brings me back from my little mother-daughter moment and I open my eyes just in time to see Aaron walk in with a fully decked out tray of food.

 

"That was quick," I remark wide eyed and he laughs while placing the tray infront of me. It's one of those mini table trays is loaded with a spread consisting of scrambled eggs, buttered toast, what looks like camomile tea and small dessert bowl of fruits and yogurt.

"Compliments of Mrs Melinda. All of this was already prepared by the time I got down there and she gave me strict instructions not to take this tray back unless you've eaten every last bit." Aaron explains.

 

I laugh with him then pick up the cup to take a sip. The tea is warm and sweet against my tongue and soothes my throat on its way down.

"This is delicious," I sigh and he smiles at me sweetly, contempt with watching me savour in his mom's home made delicacies.

The tray is cleared out in a matter of minutes and I look down in astonishment at the amount of food I've been able to ingest in recent times. Guess what they say is true, a pregnant woman really does eat for two.

Aaron takes the tray and sets it aside then climbs back into bed beside me.

 

"Isn't that better?" he asks

 

"Much. Thank you." I answer and give him a kiss on the cheek.

 

"So, baby names." he announces and I nod. 

 

"Yes. What's your top three?" I ask.

 

"Well let's see. I've always liked Melissa cause it's similar to my moms. Kiera because...well its pretty and Zoe, but that one's out." he chuckles. 

 

"Agreed. We don't need that ego getting anymore inflated then it already is." I agree and we both laugh. 

 

"What about you?" he then asks. 

 

"Well there's obviously Luna, because I just find the moon so magical. Andreia because it sounds mystical and powerful and Angelica cause it sounds blessed." I answer. He looks at me pensively then says,

 

"Angelica is my favourite pick out of your top three. What's yours out of mine." I think about it for a second then reply, 

 

"Kiera. Definetly Kiera." 

 

"OK so we can use one as a first name then the other as a second." he suggests and I nod. 

 

"Angelica Kiera doesn't really have a nice ring to it so how about Kiera Angelica?" I offer and a smile breaks through his features. 

 

"I love it." he answers and kisses my forehead while bringing his hand to my stomach. 

 

"Kiera Angelica Jackson." I sound out and around emits a sound of disapproval. 

 

"Kiera Angelica *Torres* Jackson," he corrects and I laugh. My laugh is cut short when my body is shook by the tiniest bit of movement inside me. 

 

"Did you , did you feel that?" Aaron asks wide eyed and it's all I can do to nod in my attempt to remain perfectly still. I place my hand over my tummy, my fingers tips brushing against Aaron's and ask, 

 

"Kiera? Sweet heart? Is that your way of telling mommy and daddy that you like the..." before I can finish my sentence it happens again. The most satisfying feeling in the world. A tiny movement that has the ability to make me gasp out in pure happiness as my eyes fill with tears. The most innocent and enchanting of occurrences. The feeling of our baby's first little kick. Her first little sign that she's there, that she's alive and well, that she can hear us. Aaron let's out and incredulous laugh then dips down to my tummy and kisses it. 

 

"Kiera Angelica Torres Jackson. That's you baby girl. That's who you are. A beautiful, blessed, perfect blend of your mommy and daddy," he whispers to her and I let out a shaky chuckle. She kicks for a third time and I let the tears run down my face, thanking God for the gift of such an unforgettable experience. 

 

"Don't forget intelligent," I sob out happily and he answers, 

 

"Ofcourse not. With the parents she's got she'll be the most intelligent and socially conscious young lady this world has ever had. A blessing in every way." he caresses my tummy and she kicks again, this time more forcefully. 

 

"That's my strong girl!" Aaron laughs and I join him. Our laughter echoes out through the house as the melody of two young lovers turned first time parents who are getting their first ever glimpse of parental pride and unconditional love for another life. 

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spicy content warning 😜🤭

[6th month - Ana]

 

The telephone on the table rings and without taking my eyes off of the schedule I'm currently working on, I pick it up and bring it to my ear.

 

"Dean Telphy's office how may I help you?" I answer effortlessly while simultaneously filling in the deans latest appointment. Telphys assistant had to move for personal reasons (though if you ask me she was looking for a way to politely quit) and I happened to have been looking for a job. It was close to home and benefited from my expert organisational skills so I signed up as soon as I'd heard. As an added bonus it excuses me from all my classes so as long as I can get my assignments done on time and keep my GPA score up then there is no problem. The pay is quite reasonable and I've managed to set some aside for when Kiera is finally born.

 

"Yes, good afternoon," comes Aaron's voice from the other end and a pleased smile spreads across my lips. 

 

"I'd like to find out when the future Mrs Jackson would be coming home. I'm whipping up some dinner and would hate for it to be cold by the time she gets back."

Once we got back from our trip to visit Aaron's parents, I found out that he'd already asked my own mother and father for my hand in marriage. Papa took some convincing, but soon (to my mothers extreme joy) he caved. Thank you Skype! Both pairs of parents got into contact with eachother and as an engagement gift they joined forces and got Aaron and I, our own apartment. We're just above Zoe and Nomi and many tears were she'd when the last box was moved from my bedroom (despite the fact that the distance between us is literally a floor).

 

"Mmm mi amor. It's so good to hear your voice." I chime into the phone, suddenly longing to hold him. 

"I should be home in the next..." I briefly glimpse down at my wrist watch which tells me that it's three in the afternoon. "Two to three hours," 

 

"Oh no," he cries sadly and I find myself worrying. 

 

"What's wrong?" I ask, alarmed. 

 

"Nothing it's just...that's a long time to wait and I really miss you." I can practically hear the pout in his voice and my heart strings quake a little at his level of adorable cheesiness. 

 

"Aww baby. I'll be home before you know it." I reassure him, my smile somehow wider than before. 

 

"You promise?" he persists and I can't help but chuckle. 

 

"I do. Kiera and I will be home soon and we're both famished." 

 

"Well then. I'll have those hot wings ready by the time you get here," he responds and Kiera offers up a little kick, making me jump a little. 

 

"Your daughter just kicked so I'm guessing she's going to hold you to that promise," I laugh while genlty rubbing my tummy to calm her down. She's been very restless lately but I don't complain (much). It's part of the beauty of growing a human being inside you - or atleast that's what I tell myself at three in the morning when my darling daughter decides to practice her gymnastics routine. 

 

"You let my little princess know that daddy is on it!" he replies with excitement. 

 

"I will papi." I answer and knowingly wait for his reply. 

 

"Ohhhh you playing dirty. You know that's my trigger word." he answers and his voice takes on a huskier tone. 

 

"Which word? Papi?" I feign innocence and I can practically feel him shudder over the phone. 

 

"Mmm. Say it again." he whispers. 

 

"Papi." I obey, camouflaging my voice with a moderate level of seduction. 

 

"Mm! That's hot! OK imma go now before I end up doing something reckless." He says and I laugh. 

 

"Reckless like what?" I wonder. 

 

"Reckless like taking a cab there and reorganising your desk with your body." He suggests and this time I'm the one who shivers. Our lives had turned into this back and forth phone flirt game but as soon as we get home we're both too tired to do anything more than spoon and fall asleep. Aaron managed to get a paid internship at a law firm and even though he's forté is politics, law was the next best thing. I have to say that I was hit with a certain amount of guilt at him passing over his dream for me and the baby but he put my mind at ease and guaranteed me that it was only temporary. 

 

"Now that's a promise that mommy might have to hold you to." I tease, keeping my voice as low as I possibly can. 

 

"What did I ever do to deserve you?" he asks. 

 

"Developed an obsession for scooters and unsual pizza toppings," I answer softly with a love struck expression spreading across my face as I hear him chuckle on the other end. 

 

"I love you Aaron." I say and I mean every last word. 

 

"Te quiero mucho Analisa." he answers and I let out a warm chuckle before we hang up. 

 

Two hours have never gone by this slowly and by the time Telphy is packed and leaving I almost run him over in my attempt at escape. My mind is a buzz with a hundred sinful thoughts and there's a Greek God waiting at home for me. I close my eyes in the back of the cab and picture arriving home to Aaron in the kitchen wearing nothing but an apron and a seductive grin. The car slows down and I open my eyes, pushing the image to the back of my mind and paying the cab driver before I rush up to the apartment. 

 

"Aaron? I'm home." I announce as I step through the door. I'm met with a delicious smell but a disappointing silence. 

"Aaron?" I try again but still nothing. I finally find him in the bedroom, fast asleep, with a Cosmopolitan magazine over his face. I chuckle softly. Am I disappointed? Yes, but he works so hard that I can't really hold it against him. I walk up to the bed and gently take the magazine off his face, keeping my finger on the page incase he needs it later. 

 

"What on earth could he possibly be reading in Cosmopolitan?" I ask myself and open up the page out of curiosity. The title hits me hard and I wish I'd kept that page closed. 

 

*The post natal bikini body: 10 effective tips to shred baby weight.* 

 

It reads and a lump forms in my throat as I fight back the tears. I place the magazine on the side table and clamp my hands over my mouth so as to silence my sobs. I tip toe to the door then once I'm sure it's safe I make a break for the bathroom. My hands are holding on to the sink as the tears stream down my face and all I can think about is the fact that my fiancé thinks I'm hideous. Gathering up what little dignity I have left I look up at my reflection in the mirror. My tears stain my face in black, curtesy of the eye make up I so confidently put on this morning, and my swollen belly seems twice the size it was earlier. The last bit of confidence I had slips out of me and I turn away from the glass, suddenly disgusted by my own image. 

 

The hot spray of water mingles with my tears as it runs down my face and drips to the shower floor. I knew this would happen eventually. I knew that the attraction would fade once I was big enough. I just didn't expect it to hurt this much, to make me feel so hideous and unlovable. As much as its flattering to be loved for my beauty, my brains and my charm there's still a part of me that needs to feel beautiful. A part of me that longs to be desired, to be looked at like nothing in this world could ever outshine my fairness. As the water turns cold I find myself replaying a conversation we had last week regarding this very topic. I opened up about my insecurities while we watched a pageant based movie and Aaron looked me dead in the eyes and told me that none of those girls held a candle to me. He seemed sincere and I believed him, but now? Not a chance. 

 

Goosebumps rise on my skin and I turn off the shower, taking it as an indication that my body has had about enough of the chilling water. I step into the room, shivering both from the cold and from the exhaustion caused by my emotional breakdown. Aaron is sitting up in bed and he smiles up at me when he hears me enter but at the site of my ragged appearance his face falls. 

 

"Ana what's wrong?" he asks, putting the dreaded magazine aside and standing up to meet me. He reaches out to touch me but I shy away from him.

 

"Baby?" he hums and I throw him one of my death stares. 

 

"Nothing Aaron. I just want to get dressed. OK?" 

 

He seems taken aback by my harsh response but his shock only lasts a second before he steps forward and manages to wrap his arms around me and pull me in for a hug. I struggle to get free but the hold he has on me is strong and I'm too tired to fight so eventually I just stand still. 

 

"OK. Now that you're calm. What happened?" he tries again. 

 

"I already told you, nothing." I reply in a calm yet cold tone. 

 

"Ana, you're not being honest with me..."

 

"Oh that's rich coming from you Mr." I hiss and find the strength to push him away in my anger. 

 

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asks calmly, further fueling my furry. 

 

"Like you don't know!" I spit out. 

 

"Babe. Calm down. I have no idea what you're talking about." he says sounding genuinely confused. But I won't fall for that again. 

 

"Don't tell me to calm down Aaron. And you wanna know what I'm talking about? Huh?" I stomp over to the abandoned magazine and flip through it till I find the page with the weight loss article on it. 

 

"This is what I'm talking about! The fact that I, your pregnant girlfriend, am about as attractive to you as a blue whale!" I scream, tears stinging my eyes again. I've never felt so simultaneously insecure and unattractive in my life(and that includes my adolescent acne phase). I fling the issue violently in his direction and it lands on the floor infront of him, where he picks it up and looks through the article. 

 

"Babe," he says stepping towards me and holding out the magazine to me with his finger on a portion of the article written under the headline, 

 

*Birth benefits of being active during pregnancy*

 

"I know how worried you are about the birth and I thought that if I found ways to make it easier for you it would help put your mind at ease. That's what I was reading." he explains, and I suddenly feel a whole new level of foolish. 

 

"Oh, I thought -" 

 

"That I no longer found you incredibly beautiful because you're pregnant?" he asks and puts the magazine down before placing a hand on either one of my arms lovingly. 

 

"Ana, you are the finest woman I have ever seen and nothing is ever going to change that." he reassures me and I offer him a bashful smile. 

 

"Kiera hasn't taken your beauty away from you, if anything she's made you even more breathtaking. Every inch added to this belly and every new stretch mark that grows across it makes me that much more crazy about you. OK?" 

I nod my head, touched by his words and moved by the honesty in them. 

 

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go off at you like that I just...when I saw the article it just brought out the worst in me. I don't really feel very pretty lately." I admit with my eyes cast on to the floor and giving myself a mental slap on the forehead for how shallow I sound. 

 

Aaron gently holds my chin and lifts my head up till our gazes meet. 

 

"You're not pretty babe," he says as his hand moves to the knot on my towel. 

"You're gorgeous," he bends down and plants a soft kiss on my forehead. 

 

"Here." he says, then moves down to my eyes. 

 

"Here." he repeats and I begin to understand what he's doing. 

 

"Here," and he pecks my nose. 

 

"Here," and he kisses my cheek. 

 

"Definitely here." he brushes my lips with his and I think his going to stop but the towel falls the ground and he carries on going. 

 

"You're beautiful." He whispers as he slowly makes his way down my neck.

 

"You're hot." He compliments as he kisses my collarbone. 

 

"You're incredibly sexy." He breathes while giving each of my breasts a tender peck causing a rivulet of pleasure to run through me and I shudder. 

 

"You're amazing." He says softly as he leaves a trail of kisses down my swollen belly. He's kneeling infront of me now and his hands snake their way up to my hips then he gently pulls me down so that I'm seated on the edge of the bed. 

 

"You're downright sinful." He grins before licking his lips and dipping them down onto my heat. A small gasp escapes me and my body begins to heat up. He moves his lips over my sensitive folds and I close my eyes against the sensation. His tongue comes out to play and a I let out a pleased moan as he licks me into a blissful oblivion. With his hands on my legs he pulls me forward and I fall back onto the bed, completely weak under his masterful mouth. His hands creep up to my chest, claiming each of my girls and massaging them gently, adding to the overall build up of ecstacy that's pooling in my neither regions. 

He flicks his tongue over me, nibbles me, sucks me and completely drives me insane till my fingers dig into the sheets and my back arches forward as I'm rattled by the force of my orgasm. 

 

He drinks me in, then rises to lay beside me and it's all I can do to turn my head towards him. 

 

"How do you feel?" he asks with a knowing smile spread across his glistening lips. 

 

"Beautiful." I answer while caressing his cheek then I bring his head closer and kiss him. I can still taste myself on his lips and somehow I feel myself getting turned all the way on again. 

 

"Don't you ever forget it." He smirks and I smile back at him. 

 

"I'm so getting you back for that later, but for now I'm starved." I say. 

 

"Well I just ate so..." he grins and I smack his leg playfully. My hand accidentally brushes against his arousal and he visibly stiffens. 

 

"On second thought," I remark, awkwardly getting up and positioning myself in front of him. 

 

"Ana, what are you doing? What...what I about dinner?" he asks, as I loop my fingers around the waistband of his sweats. 

 

"Dinner can wait." I answer shortly before I pull his pants down and lick my lips. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK this one was hard to write because both characters are extremely opinionated when it comes to politics so I'm sorry in advance but I tried 🙈😣💜

[7th month - Aaron]

"Shh. She's coming." Zoe hushes and everyone scrambles to find a place to hide. I got in touch with Zoe two weeks ago about planning a surprise baby shower for Ana and (not surpringly) she'd already been planning it.

"I had the invitations printed the day after I found out she was expecting, hello Aaron. Catch up." she'd told me and now I find myself wondering whether she has our wedding invitations stashed away in a pretty box somewhere in her room. There comes a knock on the door and the room falls silent. The handle turns and Ana pops her head in.

"Hellooo?" she chimes and opens the door further.

"Surprise!" everyone screams and Ana nearly jumps out of her skin in fright. Her eyes open wide as realisation kicks in and her eyes begin to tear up. She smiles and hugs an energetic Zoe.  
"What is all this?" Ana asks and Zoe answers,  
"It's your baby shower silly!"

"Yeah I kinda had the idea but she was already planing it so..." I step forward and bring her in for a hug. As always she fits exactly into my arms and I love that. The baby bump somehow completes the image. Like Kiera was apart of us we didn't know we needed but now that she's here we're finally complete and the embrace is fuller, more loving and more secure than ever. I plant a kiss on Ana's forehead before I kneel in front of her and address our little girl.

"Hey there daddy's little princess. How's my Kiera doing?" I ask and plant a kiss on Ana's belly.

"She's fine. She was dancing around while I was trying to study," Ana laughed and everyone joined in.

"OK you two, you'll have plenty of time to be cute together. After the party!" Zoe snaps in her usual funny yet bossy way.  
She pulls Ana into the tiny gathering of people that consists of our usual gang and some of her friends that Zoe and the twins managed to track down. It still confuses me how a woman can find any person on the Web but can't find a pen in her purse. One of life's greatest mysteries.

I watch as she cheerfully greets everyone there, hugging and exchanging laughs with a number of people. She looks radiant and effortlessly beautiful and for the 100th time since I woke up this morning I ask myself how I ended up being so lucky.

"Hey man," comes Luka's voice from behind me and I turn around still in a daze.

"Hey, what up?" I ask.

"I have your request done. It's back at my crib. You wanna check it out?" he asks and I look back at Ana. She's blissfully unaware of my staring at her and busy enough that I can sneak out and sneak back in without her noticing.

"Yeah sure, let's do this,"

I follow Luka back to his dorm where he shows me what he's been working on. It's a beautiful piece of art and also my surprise baby shower present to Ana.

"Man, this is perfect," I compliment under my breath as I take it all in. On the canvas is a black and white sketched portrait of Ana looking down at her bump with a lacey bra on and a sheet over her bare lap. Her hair falls to the side of her face that is radiant with her motherly smile. I captured the moment last month during an early Sunday morning. I'd woken up and found her admiring the little treasure beneath her caramel skin and with a subtle stealth I'd reached for my phone and snapped a picture. Having remmebered how entranced she was by the black and white photograph of my mother, I asked Luka for some help. I didn't want to simply filter, blow up and print. I wanted something personal, something that reflected the masterpiece she trully was. Something that captured the essence of her beauty and the beauty of the moment. This was exactly it.

"Yeah, the picture was fire and with my mastery of the art? You get that. Perfection," he says while casually leaning against a table and lighting up a joint.

"Do you think she'll like it?" I ask, needing reassurance. As much as I know her better than I know myself I still get nervous when it comes to pleasing her and making her happy. Not that she's difficult to handle I just don't want to mess up. Not with her. Never with her.

"For real? She's gonna be mad psyched when she sees it." Luka answers then blows out a puff of smoke.

"OK thanks man, imma leave before I get high by proxy but thanks again. I owe you big time," I say as I pick up the painting and head for the door.

"Hey Aaron," Luka calls just as I make my exit and I turn back to address him with a questioning glance.

"Don't know if I've said it yet but congratulations. You're gonna be a great dad," he says casually yet somehow I feel it comes from a place of honesty.

"Thanks man," I nod before I leave the room. I walk back to our apartment while paying careful attention so as not to run into my fiancé. I make it without being spotted and enter into the empty apartment. A smile creeps over my face as I picture myself coming home sometime soon to find Ana asleep on the couch, exhausted from taking care of our little rebel. Kiera will start crying and when Ana stirs I'll hold her and kiss her forehead while caressing her arms and telling her to go to bed, I have it all under control. I'll tell her that I love her and she'll smile sleepy eyed and kiss my cheek before she goes to our room. Just like right now, I'll make my way to the spare room that we've turned into a nursery and I'll walk to the crib where our daughter will hush for a moment as she sences my presence. I'll pick her up gently, asking how daddy's little girl is doing, and cradle her in my arms with a promise to always keep her safe.

My chest warms with the thought as I hang the portrait up on the wall. It's opposite the door so the first thing anyone will see when they walk in here will be the crib with the picture seemingly hanging on top of it. I stand back to admire it one more time when a gasp sounds from behind me.

"Aaron it's...it's beautiful." Zoe says and I breathe out a sigh of relief.

"Thank God, you're not Ana," I say and Zoe walks in completely ignoring my comment.

"Did you have this made?" she asks while staring at the portrait.

"Yeah. Yeah I did. I asked Luka to make it for me actually, from a picture," I answer and smile proudly at the awe struck look on her face.

"It's gorgeous," Zoe compliments and I nod my head in agreement.

"She makes everything breathtaking," I say and Zoe turns around to face me.

"Aww," she coes and I look down at her in confusion.

"You're so in love." She explains and I feel my cheeks flush.

"I am." I simply respond and she smiles at me before making her way towards the door.

"Great job by the way. She's gonna love it," she remarks before she leaves.

I contemplate going back to the shower but decide that Ana deserved some time with just her friends so I let the ladies be. I spend my day on the couch instead and end up drifting off to sleep. It's early evening when I'm woken up by shower of warm kisses. I wrap my arm around her and a chuckle escapes me.

"What's all this for?" I ask between kisses.

"The portrait," she says with her lips still partially pressed against mine.

"I love it," she exclaims.

"And I love you," I flirt.

"I love you too," she answers.

I follow her back to the nursery where we both stare at the portrait for a little while. Her back flush against my chest, my arms creeping up to her expecting belly from behind, our fingers intertwined.

"It's beautiful," she says and I get a sudden sence of deja vu. Just like at my parents house I reply,

"You're beautiful," she turns her head to look up at me and smiles. I dip my head and plant a soft kiss on her lips. A tender, loving touch, nothing more.

"Alright let me get back to it. These onesies aren't going to fold themselves," she says and I look over at the changing station to find a small mountain of baby clothing waiting to be neatly folded and put away till our little girl needs them.

"I'll help," I say and follow her to the station.

My face falls when I reach the piece of furniture and on the very top I find a onesie that says:  
* _A future lady to the right_ *

My blood begins to boil and I feel my stomach churn as I pick it up.

"Ana what is this?" I ask holding the piece of clothing up like its a dirty tissue.

"Uh? A onesie?" she asks.

"It's not a onesie Ana. It's a political statement. I'm just gonna put it out there right now, our Kiera is not going to be a Conservative." I say, trying to keep my voice level low.

"Seriously Aaron? It's a onesie that was gifted to me by a fellow lady to the right and if you paid any attention to the statement you just said you would have realised that she's * _our_ * daughter, meaning we both get a say in this," she retorts and her hand rests against her hip, a clear indication that she means business.

"Ana, I do not want to argue with you..."

"Good. Cause I don't want to argue with you either. We have different political views and our daughter will grow up being familiar with them both until the day she decides which side she wants to take," Ana explains matter of factly.

"And what if she's black Ana? What then?"  I challenge.

"Then the same rules apply. What, she can't be a black Conservative woman?" she counters.

"No!" I scream without meaning to and Ana's eyes widen in that way that signifies that she's just about reached her limit.

"OK you know what? I'm not doing this with you right now. I've told you countless times before that I'm not a full on Conservative I just agree with some of their policies and if Kiera agrees with them to then so be it! You can't just..." her voice trails off replaced by a sudden look of pain and she reaches for her stomach.

"Are you OK?" I ask, the argument forgotten as my worry takes over.

"Yeah, yeah I am, I just..." her face contorts once more and she sinks to the ground.

"Wha...wha...wha...what's happening," I stutter and she shakes her head.

"I don't know. I just felt this sharp....ow!" she screams and my panic sets in.

"OK we have to get you to a hospital," I say  and she stretches out her arms to block me.

"No, it's. It's too early. I can't be going into labor." she says, her breath coming in sharp, short puffs. Her face twists again and I push my arms under her legs, with the other on her back and lift her up.

"We're going and that's final." I say sternly and start walking us towards the front door.

"Aaron, I'm scared," she whispers as we step into the elevator and I look down at her, into her eyes.

"It will be alright. I'm right here with you," I reassure her just as the doors to the lift close.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been slacking and I'm super sorry about that so I'm simply going to bombard you with all the chapters I have to offer. It's going to be emotional so I hope you're prepared. Please don't hate me 😩😩😩😩😩
> 
> XOXO  
> 🖤💜

[Ana]

 

Kiera kicks me softly, announcing that she's woken up from her usual afternoon nap and I find it cute that she has her own little routine. It's a quiet Friday afternoon and I'm lying in bed enjoying a moment of much needed relaxation. 

 

"Hi there sweetheart." I coo just as Aaron steps in with a steaming mug of chamomile tea.

 

"You OK?" he asks and I nod with a smile. He hands me the mug then bends down and pecks my lips, looking down at me after with an affectionate gaze. He won't admit it but he was just as scared as I was yesterday when he rushed me to the hospital. Turns out it was just the usual Braxton hicks scare but Aaron has turned his attentiveness up all the way. I take a sip of the tea and watch him from the rim of my cup as he places my swollen feet on his lap and treats me to a gentle massage. I called in sick today and he asked for the day off to take care of us despite my protests. Now I'm glad that he did. Between work, school and house keeping we barely have enough time to ourselves. This long weekend is long over due.

 

"So." Aaron says suddenly and I immediately know that he wants to tell me something but isn't sure what my reaction will be.

 

"So." I echo then take another sip and wait for him to continue.

 

"I uh, I need to ask you something and I need you to be completely honest with me," he says and I smile.

 

"Yes Aaron. I'm still sure that I want to marry you and my opinion won't change even after we've been married for fifty years," I answer before he has a chance to ask. Aaron smiles, brightening his face and I find myself falling in love all over again.

 

"That's actually not the question I have for you today all though technically I haven't asked as yet in the past 24 hours so I'm calling it an improvement." He says, referring to his daily routine of seeking reassurance. I swear the confident outer shell of a man completely melts away the minute he steps through those doors and it's just the three of us.

 

"So what did you want to ask?" I inquire looking at him curiously so that he knows he has my full attention. He looks at me uncertainly and I raise my eyebrow slightly, communicating to him that my worry is about to peak.

 

"OK so I'll be honest, there's very little in this world that scares me but yesterday I was afraid out of my mind because suddenly it all became real. She really is in there and she's going to come out someday soon. And I mean, I have done this before you know? Taken care of a little person? But it just feels different this time. Cause this time it's our little person. It's a little you and...and I'm just afraid that I'm gonna mess up. That I'll hold her the wrong way or that I'll make her cry," he confides in me and a dark cloud hangs over him. I smile, finding his worry endearing, and gesture for him to come closer. After taking off my shirt I guide his hand to my stomach and rest it there.

 

"Ana what..."

 

"Shh. Just give her a minute," I whisper. Exactly as planned a few seconds later Kiera stirs.

 

"You feel that?" I ask and he nods with a blissful smile on his face.

 

"That's our daughter Aaron, she's letting you know that she's here and that she's coming and that she can't wait to see you," I tell him.

 

"How do you know all that?" He asks me with a skeptical grin.

 

"Cause I'm her mother. It's my job to know." I laugh and he joins in.

 

"When I placed your hand over my stomach she wasn't frightened, she wasn't startled and it took her a few seconds to respond. You wanna know why?" I ask and he nodds curiosily.

 

"Because she trusts you Aaron. Babies have a strong connection with their mothers before their born and they can sense certain emotions as well. I love you and I trust you to be the most amazing father to our little girl because that's the only evidence you've ever given me. I know it, I feel it and so does she." I reassure him.

 

"It's OK to be scared, you're human you are going to make mistakes but it's how you learn from them and make up for them that determines what kind of parent you'll be. I'm scared too actually, I've been scared since the day I found out she was growing inside me, but my love for her and the certainty that I'll have you by my side are stronger than any fear," I carres his head and he smiles up at me with a toughtful stare. 

 

"Does that answer your question?" I ask and he nods. 

 

"Yes, but it left me with another one," he says. 

 

"What's that?" I ask.

 

"How did I ever get so lucky to have you be the mother of my child? What did I do to deserve being loved by you?" he asks and plants a kiss on the back of my hand. 

 

"You were honestly and imperfectly you." I answer and Kiera shifts a little, let's just say she agrees with my sentiment. Aaron smiles and plants a kiss on my exposed belly. 

 

"Kiera baby, you are going to be the most loved and the most beautiful baby this world has ever seen. Daddy is gonna have moments where he'll do things wrong but that's cause I'm going to be learning with you OK? But I want to make you a promise. I promise that I'll protect you to the best of my ability, that I'll always have your best interest at heart and most of all that I will love you unconditionally for the rest of our lives. I already do actually and I haven't even met you yet." He says and a teary chuckle escapes me. 

 

"I also want you to be sure that no matter what happens, your mother will always be the love of my life and my place will always be by her side." He says, then with a final peck to my stomach he rises and plants a longing kiss on to my lips. 

 

"I think you just married me." I whisper between kisses. 

 

"I was born married to you. We just need to make it official." he answers and my heart swells with a shared certainty that no other man or woman were made as perfectly for each other as Aaron and I. 

 

 

 

 


	22. Chapter 22

[Aaron - 8th month] 

 

I'm lying in bed with my eyes closed and every fibre of my being screaming exhaustion. Sleep is knocking on my door but I refuse to open because I know that Ana isn't OK.

 

"You want anything babe?" I ask with a yawn.

 

"I don't think there's anything you can do that can help me mi amor (my love). Late night discomfort is part of the joys of being pregnant," she sighs. I can tell that she's exhausted but she can't find a comfortable position to sleep in and I refuse to let myself drift off while she struggles for comfort.

 

"Can I get you a glass of warm milk maybe?" I ask and turn around to look up at her.

 

"It's OK. You just go back to sleep. I'm gonna go read a book or something," she says and I get out of bed to help her up. I help her to the nursery (where she spends most of her night's these days) and she makes herself comfortable in the rocking chair.

"Alright Kiera, it's story time," she says as she opens up the novel and begins to read. I watch her from the doorway for a second then I decide to help her out and move into the kitchen. From the cupboard I take out a small pot that I place over the stove and add milk into. Microwaves are harmful and I'll be dammed before I give my daughter radiated milk.

 

The liquid begins to bubble and I bring the heat down to a simmer, at which point I add a little honey to the milk and stir to dissolve it. The pure white becomes a delicious caramel brown, that almost reminds me of Ana's skin, and the smell is amazing. I pour the drink into a mug and take it to her in the nursery but when I get there she's fast asleep with the book laying open on her belly and her head to the side. I want to carry her to bed but she's been so sensitive lately that I think it would be best to simply cover her. So I walk in, place a pillow between her shoulder and her head, cover her and turn off the lights before I leave. The bed is cold and empty without her but I have to bare it for both my girls. As soon as my head hits the pillow, my phone rings and I look at the clock, confused. It's two in the morning, who on earth could it be? I check the number on the screen and it's my cousin Lia, Lavon's mother. Afraid that something might be wrong with the little guy I pick up.

 

"Li, what up?" I ask in a groggy tone. 

 

"Hi, my name is Monica. This was the first number on the speed dial...there's been an accident. There's a woman and a little boy, they're both unconscious. I've called the ambulance and they're on they're way...." I zone out as panic sets in. She wasn't too far away from here so I I get dressed as the lady fills me in on the exact location of the hospital. Instead of waking her up I leave a note for Ana explaining the situation and take off. My mind is running at a million miles per second as I speed to the hospital (Zoe's been leaving her car keys with us incase Ana went into labour in the middle of the night). I'm hoping that they're both OK and my heart is in my throat. I think about little Lavon and come to realise that once Kiera is here this is what my life will be like. I'll constantly be worried about whether or not she's OK, if she's been fed, if she's warm enough or cool enough, if she's happy or hurting. My previous fears about my ability to be a father come rushing back with a vengeance but I push it all back as I pull into the hospitals parking lot. I walk up to the front desk where a petite nurse in a blue uniform is jotting something down on a notepad.

 

"Hi I'm Aaron Jackson. I'm here about my cousin and nephew, uh, Lia and Lavon Trein." I say and wait for her reply. She looks up at me from her notepad and offers me a tired smile before turning to the computer and typing something in.

 

"Uh yess, Mr Jackson. Could you take a seat please, the doctor will be out in a moment," she informs me and I want to press for more information but I figure that losing my mind won't help anyone right now. I take a seat and wait impatiently for the doctor to come out and one finally does. He's dressed in scrubs and his head is convered in Salt and Pepper hair.

 

"Mr Jackson?" he asks when he reaches me and I stand up to shake his hand

 

"Yes that's me," I answer.

 

"I'm Dr Green I've been in charge of your cousin and her son, tell me do they have any other relatives? Does Ms Trein have any living parents perhaps?" he asks and I begin to grow nervous.

 

"Uh... She does yes, but they're estranged and everyone else is far but none of that matters how is she? How are *they*? " I ask and he regards me with a sombre expression. 

 

"Lavon is fine, just a little bruised and a fractured arm but otherwise he's fine. Unfortunately his mother wasn't so lucky. I'm sorry to say Mr Jackson but Ms Trein didn't make it," he explains and my legs grow week. I slump back down onto the chair in utter shock and I feel disoriented.

 I cover my mouth with my hand as tears sting the back of my eyes but I refuse to cry. Maybe if I don't shed a single tear it won't be true. I stand my ground and convince myself that it's all a lie but the minute I come face to face with a confused and teary eyed Lavon, my barriers begin to break down. He's throwing a complete tantrum and yelling for his mother but he calms down when he sees me and I hug him tight. 

 

"Hey there little man," I say with a shaky voice.

 

"Big A." he sobs as he hugs me tight with his good arm. 

 

"I'm here to take you home little man." I say. I know the question that's coming next and though I try to brace myself for it... 

 

"Where's mommy?"

 

It shatters me nonetheless.

 

"You're mommy Lavon, she uh..." I look up with my eyes wide open to clear out the tears.

 

"She's gone to see Jesus in the sky," I answer. He pulls away from me and I can see the tears coming back into his eyes. 

 

"She went without me?" his little five year old voice calls and I can hear the sadness in it. 

"When is she coming back?" he asks and a single tear escapes me, one I wipe off immediately. 

 

"She uh... She's not coming back Lavon, but I want you to listen to me ok little man? You're gonna come home with me and I'm gonna take care of you alright?" I try but he pulls away completely and starts shaking his little head no. 

 

"I want my mommy! Where's my mommy, I want my mommy!" He screams over and over again, uncontrollably. I try to calm him down but its no use. Eventually the nurses give him a light sedative and he falls asleep. I get hold of my mom and tell her the unfortunate news and she tells me to take Lavon home, she'll be here soon. He gets discharged with some painkillers and an appointment set for two weeks from now. I strap him into the back seat and try my best to drive slow. My heart shatters as I catch a glimpse of his reflection in the rear view mirror and realise how peaceful he looks. I wish that this were all a nightmare. That he could wake up in the morning and see his mother by his side, but its not and I'll just have to be strong for him. I'll have to let him scream at me and hit me and just let his anger out. By the time we reach the apartment its just after five in the morning and the sky is just about starting to lighten. I turn the keys in the lock and step inside with Lavon in my arms. Ana is seated on the sofa with a worried expression on her face. 

 

"Aaron, thank God. The alarm rang and you weren't home. I was worried sick," she says as she tries to get up. 

 

"Don't push yourself I'll be right back," I tell her and she nods concerned but doesn't say anything. I tuck Lavon in, in our bedroom and close the door softly behind me as I leave. I walk over to the living room feeling exhausted and when I get there Ana looks at me anxiously. 

 

"Lia she didn't..." she tries to ask but is unable to finish her statement. I shake my head and reply,

 

"No, she..." my words are swallowed by the sudden sobs that rip through me. 

 

"Oh babe, I'm so sorry. Come to me." Ana says and I drag my body towards the sofa. I lay my head down on her lap and she rubs my shoulder in an attempt to soothe my pain. 

 

"I'm sorry mi amor. I'm so so sorry," she sobs and gives me her hand to hold. I take it grateful that I have her to grieve with. I need to get all my pain out now because as soon as Lavon wakes up I can't afford to be weak. Looks like fatherhood has come two months early. 

 

 

 


	23. Chapter 23

[Ana]

 

I called into both offices and revealed that we had a death in the family and would be taking the rest of the week off. It's not ideal but it is necessary. Aaron is too shaken to do anything and I can't leave him alone with little Lavon under the circumstances. Both are currently asleep and I'm reading a book with a bowl of fruit salad next to me. The door to the bedroom opens and closes and I turn my head slightly to see Lavon walking up to me shyly.

 

"Hey sweety. Did you get enough sleep?" I ask and he simply stands beside the sofa and plays with his fingers.

 

"Come here Lavon." I try and he looks up me.

 

"Come here, come sit beside me," I say and he does. Slowly he comes forward and takes a seat by my side. I take his little hand and kiss it then I look at his cute little face. I know he's not Aaron's son but there's a small resemblance in the corner of his eyes and curve of his nose.

 

"How are you feeling sweety? Does anything hurt?" I ask and he simply nods.

 

"Is it your arm?" I ask again and again he just nods. 

 

"OK well how about I make you some lunch so that you can take your medicine and make it all better. Would you like that?" I ask and he shakes his head no. 

 

"You wouldn't? Well what would you like then?" I ask, thinking that he probably wants take out. 

 

"I want mommy," he says and I feel a pull at my heart strings. 

 

"Oh baby, come here sweetheart. Let me tell you a story." I close my book and push it aside then I sit him down on my lap. 

 

"Do you go to church Lavon?" I ask and he nods. 

 

"So do you know about God's angels?" I ask, again he nods. 

 

"Do you like the angels?" another nod. 

 

"What do you like about them?" I ask and he looks at me for a moment before answering. 

 

"I like that they're pretty and they don't let the shadows get the little children like me." he answers. 

 

"That's good Lavon. Now your mommy, she's become one of God's angels now and she's up in the sky, looking after you and keeping all the shadows away. OK?" He nods. 

 

"Will I ever see her again?" he asks. 

 

"You will baby, you will. One day when you're much older you'll see your mommy again but for now you just need to close your eyes and think about her and know that she's right there by your side."

 

"Really?" he asks. 

 

"Yes sweety really. You wanna try it?" I ask and he nods then closes his eyes. 

 

"That's it baby. Close your eyes and think of your mommy." I place my hand on his little chest and his heart seems to be picking up speed. 

 

"Can you feel that? That warm feeling in your heart."

 

"Mmhmm. Is that my mommy?" he asks and a tear escapes my eyes as a small smile crosses his innocent little face. 

 

"Yes it is Lavon. That's your mommy." I sniffle and his eyes open wide and he looks at me with wonder. He's no longer over come by grief but slowly becoming a child again. 

 

"I felt her. I felt my mommy." He smiles and I offer him a teary smile in return. 

 

"That's great baby." I say and plant a kiss on his little forehead. 

 

"Now can we get something to eat?" I ask and he nods enthusiastically. 

 

"OK. How would you like some cereal?" I ask. 

 

"Yes please!" he exclaims and a chuckle escapes me as I see the life slowly come back to his eyes. He scooches off my lap and I get up (after much struggle) and walk over to the kitchen. He takes a seat as I reach for the cereal and the milk and prepare his breakfast. He eats quietly and every so often he'll stop and close his eyes then smile and continue. I watch him content imagining Kiera beside him and an unsettling thought comes to mind. What if Lavon were Kiera? What if Aaron and I were the ones in the hospital morgue? Who would handle it? Who would take care of her? Would she take comfort in knowing that we're always there? The thought scares me but death is as much a part of life as birth, if anything its the only certainty we have. 

 

With that in mind, I find a piece of paper and a pen and while Lavon eats I take the time to write my unborn daughter a letter... 

 

*Dear Kiera*

 

*If you're reading this then mommy's probably gone to the great place in the sky. If so there are a few things I want you to know.*

 

*First and most important of all I want you to know that I love you. I've loved you since the day you started growing inside me and I will always love you even if I can't be there in person. My soul belongs to you sweetheart and where ever you go I will always be with you.*

 

*Secondly I want you to know that your father is and always will be the love of my life, but if he decides to move on I need you to be a big girl and accept your new stepmother with open arms. Unless she's a mean girl then go ahead and fill that shampoo bottle with hair dye.*

 

*Thirdly I wish you all the greatest joys this life has to offer and I want you to know that there's so much potential in you. What ever you dream of doing, whatever you set your mind to, you can do it. I believe in you and I am with you every step of the way. You were destined for greatness sweet heart, never let the world tell you otherwise.*

 

*I love you with all my heart Kiera Angelica Torres Jackson, and I wish you joy. Not happiness but joy. Happiness is fleeting, its felt in a moment and just as suddenly as it appears it can dissappear. But joy is every lasting, its eternal and I want you to be a joyous bundle of sunshine for as long as you live. Remember to always be true to yourself and the rest of the world will follow.*

 

*I love you forever mi hija.*

*Mama*

 

I finish writing and read over it satisfied. My hand rests on my tummy and I think of all the things I wanted to add. How terrified I was when I first found out I was pregnant and how knowing that she was with me gave me the strength to over come that fear. How it felt when her dad and I heard her heartbeat for the first time as a couple. The smile she put on my face when she moved for the first time or when we found out she was a girl. The glimmer that comes into Aaron's eyes eveytime he talks about her or to her. I want to put it all on paper, I want her to know exactly how important she is to us. 

 

"What are you doing?" Aaron's voice sounds from behind me and I look up to find him staring down at me curiously. 

 

"Morning mi amor. Uh, I was just writing a letter." I answer as I hand him the piece of paper. Lavon walks up to us and takes a seat on Aaron's lap. 

 

"Big A, big A. My mommy's an angel now." he says and Aaron offers him a sad smile. 

 

"That's right Lavon. She is." he confirms. 

 

"I'm sad cause I don't get to see her but it's OK cause I can feel her in my heart when I close my eyes." he explains and Aaron gives me a questioning look. 

 

"That's right baby." I answer and rub the little boys back. 

 

"Your mommy is always gonna be right there." I say and place my hand over his heart. He smiles then sits the right way around and I turn on the TV for him. Some cartoon is on and he gets excited and moves closer to the TV. 

 

"So, what is this letter for?" Aaron asks softly and I turn my attention back on to him. 

 

"It's a letter for Kiera. You know with everything that's happened with Lavon I thought we should be prepared for anything you know." I explain and he nods as clarity shows in his features. He reaches for a pen and paper too and starts writing his own letter then we fold them both up and place them in one of the drawers in the nursery with a silent prayer that we'll never have to use them. 

 

 

 

 


	24. Chapter 24

[9th Month]

 

It's two thirty in the morning when Ana shakes Aaron awake. She's been feeling weird all day and falling asleep was, as always, a battle but something felt different. Something felt wrong. She couldn't quite put her finger on it but the minute she started to fall asleep she searched for that familiar thud-thud that she'd somehow associated with Kiera's heart beat and that's when she realised that it wasn't there. Her eyes shot open and she took deep breaths trying to calm herself down and chalking it up to pre-birth paranoia but she couldn't shake off the feeling. 

 

"Aaron. Aaron wake up. Somethings wrong with Kiera." she says. Aaron startles awake and looks at her wide eyed. Confused and scared Ana starts to cry and Aaron immediately spurs into action. He gets up and walks out of the room and she assumes that he's going to take Lavon to Zoe's. Ana says a little prayer and gets out of bed to get herself dressed. She barely takes two steps forward when her legs are suddenly drenched. She looks down at the floor and realisation kicks in. Her water has just broken. She breathes out a sigh of relief, reassuring herself that the feeling she's had all day was simply her body preparing for her to give birth. It was her daughter telling her that she was ready to meet them. A smile creeps onto Ana's lips and she grabs a white, floor length dress and makes her way to the bathroom where she towels down and changes. Aaron comes back and finds her standing at the doorway with the Kiera's hospital bag slung over her shoulder. 

 

The worry in his eyes melts away when he notices the radiant smile on her face and she looks at him with tears of joy in her eyes. A message passes between them in that moment: it's time. Tonight they're lives change forever. From now on they'll be a family and their soul purpose in life will lie in the tiny hands of the little treasure that is on her way. Aaron rushes into the bedroom and gets dressed, his heart beating fast with excitement. He's finally going to meet his little girl, finally going to hold her in his arms. Aaron realises that he misses her then he chuckles silently to himself as he wonders how he could possibly miss someone he has never met. 

The answer is simple, because she comes from him, she was apart of him that was growing inside Ana and now she would be apart of them both on the earth. He can hardly contain his joy. Right now, all he wants to do is scream at the top of his lungs that he's going to be a father. He reaches the living room and finds Ana hunched over with an agonising expression on her face. Worry sets back in and he walks to her and rubs her back. They both begin to breathe, her because she has to and him because he doesn't know what else to do to help her. After a moment she straightens and he offers her a questioning look. She nods and he holds on to her as they walk out of the apartment with a promise that when they return they will not be the same people walking out. 

 

The short drive to the hospital is mostly silent, occasionally punctuated with quick, sharp breaths and Ana's soft yelps of pain. She's trying to contain herself and Aaron wishes he could tell her that it's OK to scream but he knows better. He knows that telling her what she can and cannot do at the moment will only make her angry so he simply keeps his mouth shut and focuses on the road. Ana is grateful for the silence. It allows her to prepare herself mentally while fighting against the spontaneous bursts of pain. 

 

They park at the emergency entrance and Aaron rushes in to get help. Nurses rush out with him and help Ana onto a stretcher and she's rolled inside. She's taken to a private room and Aaron holds her hand as they wait for the doctor. 

'I love you' he mouths and a tear slips down from the corner of her eye.

'I love you too' she mouths back. 

The doctor steps in and greets them briefly before barking out orders at the nurses. While they scramble to get everything ready the doctor once again turns her attention towards the couple and asks Ana about her level of pain. Ana labels it as a five out of ten and the doctor then checks her dialiation, concluding that she's not too far along. Everything seems to be running smoothly until the doctor, for safety reasons, decides to do a final ultrasound. They wait patiently for the oh so familiar thud-thud. It doesn't come. Panic begins to set in as the doctor moves the wand this way, then that in search of a heartbeat that just isn't there. Ana asks what's happening, as worry threathens to consume her and the doctor explains that Kiera might be in danger but there's a small chance that they can save her if they act now. 

 

She's moved to the surgery room and numbed from the waist down, all the while Aaron holds on to her hand and his touch is reassuring. The operation seems to take a while and Ana closes her eyes and prays through it all. Aaron feels an indescribable sense of calm. It's not like the night Lavon was born where his mind was filled with chaos and what if's. This time he's completely at peace and it feels surreal that the moment for which they've prepared for was finally here. Sure there were concerns at the back of his mind cause Kiera was in fact a little early but truth be told he was glad cause he felt like he couldn't wait any longer to hold her. 

 

Finally she surfaces, covered in blood and completely...silent. Aaron squeezes Ana's hand and she opens her eyes to see the nurses move Kiera to what she assumes is the cleaning station but the silence seems deafening despite the monotone beep of the heart monitor. Time seems to slow down as her brain begins to make sence of what's happening. She's not crying cause she's not breathing. The nurses commence CPR on her little girl and Ana feels the sting of tears behind her eyes. 'What's happening?' she keeps thinking. 'Why isn't she crying?' she asks herself. 

 

'Did I do something wrong?'.

 

The question hammers her brain incessantly as desperation washes over her like a wave during a storm, drowning her with a fear and dread so powerful she begins to sob uncontrollably. Through out the nine months they'd prepared for this very moment. They talked about early births, water births and late births. They discussed whether or not Ana would take the epidural. They talked about natural birth vs cesarean, adjustments they'd have to make incase Kiera turned out to be a special needs child and even had God parents picked out in case anything happened to them. They'd thought about every outcome but this one. They didn't prepare to lose her. 


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!   
> Sooooo sorry about the late chapter. After the finale I've just been demotivated to right for this ship 😭😭😭 but I'm keeping my hopes up (hope is the last to die right?) 😢💜
> 
> This is the second last chapter. Hold on to your tissues it might get emotional. Enjoy 💜💜

Hollow

That's the only way to describe what Ana feels as she walks into the apartment empty handed and not even that coldly uncharacteristic word can fully encompass her true emotions. Hollow doesn't describe how empty she feels, how broken to the point of numbness she feels. It doesn't paint the gut twisting picture of a person who feels lifeless, like everything within her is as dead as air. Like she's nothing more than a useless shell of skin because for the past nine months she had redifined her existence so that the only identity she possessed was that of a mother. Now she is nothing, because how can she be a mother with out someone to call her mom? How can she be a mother when no life grows inside her? How can she be a mother when her arms are cold and the house she once called a home is silent?

She has to find a way to be Ana again but that is a task that is proving to be exceptionally difficult. She doesn't know how to be Ana. Ana hadn't felt the kicks of her little girl inside her. Ana hadn't picked out baby names and heard a little heartbeat every time she closed her eyes. Ana hadn't spent hours in the nursery imagining what it would be like to change, clothe, put to sleep and sing to a little human who soully depended on her. No. Ana had transformed the minute she found out Kiera was growing within her and now...now she doesn't know who she is.

She doesn't recognise the red eyed person who stares back at her in the mirror. She feels like a stranger in her own body. A body covered in stretch marks that are simply a painful reminder of what used to be. A body who's breasts ache with the pressure of milk that was meant to provide strength and growth but now is nothing more than agonising. A body that craves the warmth of new life and wakes in the middle of the night expecting to hear an infants cry but instead has to face a haunting silence. A body that shys away from the touch of the man she's supposed to love. Does she still love him? She doesn't know. Ana loved him. Kiera's mom loved him but this...new person? This childless stranger? This damaged woman who barely recognises her own name? She doesn't know how she feels for how could she possibly love someone if she barely knows who she is?

How could she look him in the eye and tell him she loves him when she could barely give him a child? How could she let him kiss her and hold her and make love to her when the outcome of such intimacy would be fear, frustration and indescribable grief? How could she let herself be swept away in his arms when his embrace reminds her so much of the person she once used to be? A person who deserved his affection.

To him she still does. He is just as broken. His thoughts just as dark the only difference is that he is trying hard not to let it consume him. He's fighting to stay a float so that he can drag her to shore. Aaron can see that she's drowning and that is tearing away at him but he'll never show it. He can't be weak now. She needs him. She needs him to hold her when she wakes up with nightmares. She needs him to feed her so that she doesn't wither away. She needs him to talk to her so that she isn't consumed by the voices in her head. She needs him to love her to make up for the guilt she's filling herself with. He also needs her. He needs her to be his distraction. He needs to care for her and be strong for her because if he allows himself a moment of silence, if he allows himself to feel, if he allows himself to think about their little girl, he might not make it to shore and he'll drown in a sea of despair.

He'll lose himself in his pain and there might not be a way back. How could he ever come back from the realisation that he would never hold their baby in his arms, never see her smile or celebrate her first steps? How could he ever come back from the knowledge that she'd never see her first birthday or go to prom? How could he erase the question of what her voice would sound like the first time she called him 'daddy'? How could he live with himself knowing that he couldn't protect her? That he couldn't keep her alive? That she's alone in a dark hole, six feet under ground and there's nothing he can do about it? He can't. Plain and simple. There's no coming back from that dark path so he chooses not to take it. He chooses to fight against those thoughts and focus his energy on Ana. She needs him more. Her and little Lavon are his only reasons for living. Tragic as it may be, they both came to him out of death but none the less they depend on him to remind them that there's life after grief.

Is there really? That's the question that Ana's been asking herself. Is there really life after grief? Is there anyway for her to move on from this? Can a mother ever trully heal from the loss of her child? These are the question's she asks her self as she steps into the quiet nursery. She hasn't been in here since they got back from the hospital, she couldn't bring herself to do it. She folds her trembling arms to keep her self from shaking as the sobs rock her weakened body. Going in there makes her feel like she's being shot multiple times. Each step she takes into the cursed space is like a new bullet ripping through her and its all she can do to stay up. She takes in each and every corner. The rocking chair where she'd fallen asleep many a night. The chest of drawers that holds neatly folded clothing her daughter will never wear. The changing station destined to never be used. The picture above the baby bed that showed a happy her, a her that was whole, a her with a future, a her she'll never be without Kiera. Finally there's the crib, where Kiera would spend most of her time for the first few months of her life. Her heart beat pounds in her ears as she gets closer to the empty baby bed. She says a silent prayer under her breath for a miracle. The sound of her heart grows louder and she closes her eyes, preferring to walk the rest of the way blind. Silence takes over, time stops and she catches her breath. She walks towards the baby bed slowly and suddenly....

A scream breaks through her trans. She opens her eyes and she's back at the hospital and the scream that brought her back was none other than Kiera taking her first breath. She turns to Aaron for confirmation and the teary smile on his face tells her all she needs to know. They did it. They're little girl was safe. For the longest minute of their lives all they'd been planning for, for the past nine months seemed to have been destroyed but now here she is and Ana let's the tears of relief flow.

"She's beautiful," Ana sobs once they're out of the operation room and Kiera is cradled in her arms.

"Just like her mother," Aaron whispers and Ana can tell by the softness of his voice that his heart has turned into complete mush at the site of their little girl. A knock sounds at the door and Ana tells the visitor to come in without taking her eyes off of her daughter.

"Hey..." comes Zoe's whispered greeting as she pokes her head inside. She gasps softly in admiration as she comes in followed by the rest of the gang. A chorus of awww's rings out through the room as they each lay their eyes on the tiny human in Ana's arms.

"She's precious." Jazz coos and every one nods their heads in agreement.

"She is," Ana emphasises knowingly.

"What's her name?" Nomi asks.

"Kiera." Ana replies.

"Kiera Angelica Torres Jackson," Aaron adds.

"No," Ana exclaims thoughtfully then clarifies,

"Kiera Lia Torres Jackson."

"Lia?" Aaron asks in a tone that poses the question 'are you sure'.

"Yeah Lia, because she's a fighter just like her aunt and that's the name Lavon picked for her when I talked to him last week. I think as adoptive older brother he deserves to name her." Ana explains and Aaron leans in to kiss her.

Another round of aww's and when they part he connects his forehead to hers in a silent 'I love you'. The camera flashes as Zoe snaps a picture and freezes the moment forever.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I dragged this one out a little I'm sorry for that everyone 💜
> 
> But here is the final chapter. Bringing the story to (what I hope is) an adequate close. This story started off as a little fun between my friends and I, and slowly gained a life of its own. 
> 
> I want to thank everyone who's stuck with me through out it and again apologise for the super slow posting. I'll up my game I promise 💜💜
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this last bit and thank you once again.
> 
> Lots of love💜  
> \- A. J.

Stepping into the apartment, with Kiera in her arms and the man she loves pressing a reassuring hand against her back to steer her in, feels like something out of a dream.

"Surprise!" comes the collective scream from inside that is soon hushed by two (already) over-protective parents.

"Surprise" they all whisper instead and Ana holds back a laugh. Everyone has gathered in their apartment to welcome the newest member of the Torres-Jackson family. Who needs a ring and piece of paper when you have an actual human life to reflect on the depth and strength of your love and devotion to one another. Even their parents made the trip to meet the little angel that would join their families forever. The smile on Ana's face is unlike any Aaron has ever seen and his love for her seems to grow daily since Kiera's birth. Now she isn't just the love of his life and his fiancé. Now she is the mother of his child. She's given him the greatest gift any person could ask for and gave him the title of father. A name he aims to honour for as long as he lives.

Ana takes a seat on the couch and the group gathers around her like a worshiping crowd, each cooing at the sight of the precious little bundle. She stirs, making a sound that hints at the beginning of a cry and a collective aww sounds through the room.

"I think she's hungry. I'll be right back." Ana says before she leaves the crowd and makes her way to the nursery. There she sits on the rocking chair and places a pillow beneath her daughters head then proceeds to breast-feed her. She watches amazed as Kiera suckles, filled with a sence of gratitude for her ability to nurture her treasure. There are no lengths she won't go through nor path she won't travel to ensure the well being of her baby girl and that is the only truth she needs to live by, in her mind. A knock sounds at the door and Ana barely takes her eyes off of her baby. She simply asks the guest to enter but as soon as he wraps his arms around her she knows it's Aaron.

"How are my girls?" He asks after planting a kiss to the side of Ana's head.

"We're both OK, aren't we Kiera?" Ana whispers and a gentle sound emanates from the infant in her arms. Kiera pulls away, signaling that she's satisfied, and Ana replaces her breast into the safety of her bra and lifts her baby up to birp her.

"Do you need anything? Are you hungry or tired?" Aaron asks, ever the attentive partner. Despite his own exhaustion he always puts Ana and now Kiera first.

"I'm OK babe. You should really get some sleep though. You barely slept at the hospital." she expresses her worry. He rises from his kneeling perch and gives her forehead a kiss.

"I'll rest when she's 21 and in college. Maybe." he jokes and Ana chuckles.

"She barely has her first tooth and you're already an overprotective papa bear." she teases, though deep down she shares his sentiment.

"Tease all you want it won't make me any less protective. I promised her that I wouldn't let any harm come to either of you and I aim to keep that promise till I take my last breath." he proclaimes and Ana simply smiles up at him.

"Besides, have you seen our daughter? With that pretty face she's definitely going to be a heartbreaker." he adds and they both laugh. They fall into a comfortable silence, simply watching the tiny human with the mesmerised expressions of two children in a magic show.

"She's here. Our little person," Aaron remarks while carefully carressing Kiera's head, the feel of how her head fit in his hand simultaneously endearing and frightening. She's so small that it scares him but it also makes protecting her that much more important to him.

"Yeah she is. The best of both us in one little bundle of cuteness," Ana adds.  
Kiera starts to cry and Ana rocks her in her arms with a whispered "shh".

"I think she needs some sleep." Ana says softly, already becoming fluent in baby language. A collective laugh echoes from the living room and the couple turns their heads in that general direction.

"I guess I'd better go host. I'll leave you to it." he says before he pecks her lips and leaves the room. Ana leans her weight into the chair to give it momentum and softly begins to sing.

"Duérmete mi niña, duérmete mi amor  
duérmete pedazo de mi corazón.   
Esta niña mía que nació de noche  
quiere que la lleve a pasear en coche.  
Esta niña mía que nació de día  
quiere que la lleve a la dulcería.  
Duérmete mi niña, duérmete mi amor  
duérmete pedazo de mi corazón  
(Go to sleep my girl, go to sleep my love  
Fall asleep piece of my heart.  
This girl of mine who was born at night  
She wants me to take her for a drive.  
This girl of mine who was born by day  
She wants me to take her to the candy store.  
Go to sleep my girl, go to sleep my love  
Fall asleep piece of my heart)."

Kiera's breathing becomes even and Ana stops for a few seconds, ensuring that she's trully asleep, before she walks over to the crib and gingerly lays her daughter down. A flash of the vision she had at the hospital creeps into her mind and her arms suddenly feel empty. She wants to pick Kiera back up and just hold her but the mother inside her whispers that it would compromise her baby's comfort so she simply contents herself with watching the little girl sleep. Ana places her hand on her daughters chest and once again begin to sings.

"Duérmete mi niña, duérmete mi amor  
duérmete pedazo de mi corazón."

A familiar voice blends in with hers and she turns around to find her father stepping towards her.

"Esta niña mía que nació de noche  
quiere que la lleve a pasear en coche.  
Esta niña mía que nació de día  
quiere que la lleve a la dulcería." They sing together before he wraps his arms around her and Ana closes her eyes feeling once again like a little girl.

"Duérmete mi niña, duérmete mi amor  
duérmete pedazo de mi corazón." Her father whispers to her, just as he did when she was but a babe, then he plants a kiss on her head and squeezes her tight.

"Mi hija. Mi pequeña niña. Eres una mamá ahora. (My daughter. My little girl. You're a mom now.)" He says, without letting go of her.

"Yo soy papa Y quiero disculparme, porque sé que no es lo que habías planeado. Pero no puedo, no cuando disculparse significa mentir. No puedo mentirte papa. No me arrepiento de Kiera. Ella es mi angelita perfecta. Mía y de Aaron. Un símbolo vivo de nuestro amor y la única razón de mi existencia. No puedo disculparme por ese papá. Ella no es un pecado que necesito confesar. Ella es un milagro que agradezco a Dios.(I am papa. And I want to apologise, because I know it's not what you had planned. But I can't, not when apologising means lying. I can't lie to you papa. I'm not sorry about Kiera. She's my perfect little angel. Mine and Aaron's. A living symbol of our love and the only reason for my existence. I can't apologise for that papa. She's not a sin I need to confess to. She's a miracle I thank God for.)"

Her father gives her one last squeeze before he holds her at arms length and says.

"No necesito que te disculpes, mi corazón. En todo caso, soy yo quien debería disculparse. Reaccioné de forma exagerada porque estaba herido. Eres mi niña, eres mi Kiera y de repente estabas teniendo un bebé propio, lo que significaba que estabas creciendo y ... No quería que lo hicieras. Crecer significa dejarte ir y todavía no estoy listo para eso.  
(I don't need you to apologise, my heart. If anything I'm the one who should be apologising. I overreacted because I was hurt. You're my little girl, you're my Kiera and suddenly you were having a baby of your own which meant that you were growing up and... I didn't want you to. Growing up means letting you go and I'm not ready for that quite yet.)"

"Aww Papá," Ana sobs and gives her father a tight hug.

"I thought you were dissapointed." she whispers.

"No, disappointed? At you? Never." he says then pulls back and cups her face in his hand.

"Escucha mi corazón No estoy decepcionado de ti. ¿No me has traído nada más que orgullo y verte con Kiera? Nunca he estado más orgulloso. Vas a ser una madre increíble mi tesoro.   
(Listen my heart. I'm not dissapointed in you. You've brought me nothing but pride and seeing you with Kiera? I've never been prouder. You're going to be an amazing mother my treasure.)"

"Gracias papá. (Thank you daddy.)" she sobs and he draws her back in for another hug. Ana can't explain the over all sense of relief and happiness that's soaring through her at the moment. It's true, she can't apologise for Kiera but being at odds with her father would have left a hole in her that she would never have been able to fill. A gentle knock at the door interrupts their father-daughter moment and they turn towards the sound to find a worried Aaron coming in.

"Is everything alright?" he asks and Ana nods while wiping away her tears.

"Yeah, everything's perfect. What's up?" she asks.

"Uh. I need your help. Our moms are currently throwing dagger eyes at eachother. Something about who's wedding dress you get to wear." Aaron says awkwardly though Ana can't tell if it's because of their mother's feud, her fathers presence or both.

"Oh gosh. We better get in there." She laughs as her and her father follow Aaron out the door towards the gathering.

........

The room is dimley lit and Ana lays on Aaron's chest, his arms are around her and they're enjoying their first, at home, moment of peace since becoming parents. Ana jerks her head back slightly to look at him and finds Aaron in deep thought.

"What's on your mind?" she asks and he looks down at her with a distant look.

"Nothing." He answers.

"Aaron, we have a daughter together. Do you seriously think I don't know when somethings bothering you?" she asks with raised eyebrows.  
"Come on, spill."

He grins and answers,   
"It's just... Seeing you with your dad today made me realise something,"

"What's that?" she inquires.

"That being a father is a forever job. No matter how old she grows whenever I hold her in my arms it will always feel like the very first time. She'll always be my little girl." he explains with a sparkle in his eyes.

"Yeah. That's the beauty of being a parent. It's like growing up all over again just that this time you're doing it by proxy. Doesn't mean that the growing pains are any less painful. Just means they're alot less physical. But we'll have eachother to work through them." Ana snuggles closer to Aaron and he kisses the top of her head.

"Yeah. We're a team." He agrees.

Kiera's cry buzzes in through the baby monitor and both Ana and Aaron sit up.

"It's my turn. Lay back down and try to get some sleep, you've had a long day. You should get some rest." He tells her and she smiles, laying back down and resting her head on the pillow. Aaron gets up and makes his way out the room but before he crosses the threshold of the door Ana's voice calls out to him.

"Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being the best father our little girl could ask for."

He smiles bashfully, his confidence renewed by her words, and makes his way to the nursery. Almost as if she senses her father's presence, Kiera hushes as soon as Aaron walks into the room. Lavon is thankfully still fast asleep.

"Hey there baby girl. Its alright, daddy's gotcha." He says as he gently takes her into his arms. After a quick diaper change, Aaron settles down in the rocking chair and holds Kiera up against his bare chest. She falls asleep, he can tell, but for some reason he just can't let her go.

"Your ma was right Kiera. Being a parent is like growing up all over again. The good thing about that is that I have our whole lives to learn how to let you go. But for tonight, imma keep on holding on." He whispers to her before he leans his head back and closes his eyes, drifting off to sleep minutes later. Ana, feeling his absence, decides to check up on him and her heart swells at the site. She walks in and picks Lavon up from his bed before gently shaking Aaron awake.

"Come on, let's all go to bed." She says, and carries the little boy towards the bedroom. There they snuggle together, one great big happy family. For the rest of the night Kiera sleeps soundly, safely encapsulated in the arms of her father and surrounded by the warmth of a family that loves her unconditionally.

 

 


End file.
